Mucked Up My Self-Care Podcast

Hosted by Jill Olish and Linda Bonney

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132

Latest episode

Jun 2026

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About the show

A podcast for moms about the real, raw, and unscripted perspectives of guilt-free self-care by two moms across the globe. This unedited podcast is real life and their personal experiences told in friendly conversation style. Advocating for all moms who have mucked up their self care. There are so many others out there that aren't successfully solving the real problem of trying to figure out what self-care is. We want to bring to light the reality of what self-care can look like for moms who struggle to fit it in, don't know what will work for them, and the ways that it hasn't worked. We want to have conversations about the guilt we feel when we are pressured to mother ourselves when we don't know how and aren't given the support to in our society today.

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60 recent

June 1, 202628 min

The Mental Load is in a Self-Care Crisis

What if the reason self-care feels impossible isn't laziness, lack of time, or poor planning — but the invisible, never-ending mental load that mums carry every single day? In this episode of Mucked Up My Self Care, Linda and Jill get real about the weight of the mental load: the planning, scheduling, remembering, and organising that keeps the family ship afloat — and quietly drowns our capacity for self-care. From pregnancy brain to tea towels that seem to multiply on the bench, this conversation is warm, honest, and deeply relatable for any mum who has ever felt like her brain just won't switch off.In this episode, you'll learn:Why the mental load is a self-care crisis — and the research that backs it upHow mums carry the majority of household mental load tasks and what that actually costs usWhy awareness of the mental load isn't always enough to change it — and what the real gap isWhat it looks like to gently let go of mental load tasks, even just for a seasonHow to start sharing the load with a partner, your kids, or your wider support networkWhy passing off even one small task out loud can be a powerful first stepThe role society and systems play in keeping mums overwhelmed — and why it's not your faultHow to identify the one piece of your mental load you've been silently carrying aloneThe mental load doesn't take a day off — but you deserve a break from carrying it all alone. Whether you're deep in pregnancy, parenting solo, or navigating a household where the invisible work still somehow lands on your shoulders, this episode is your reminder: you are not failing. You are carrying too much. Jill and Linda invite you to start small — name the one thing you've been silently managing, and consider who else could hold a piece of it. That conversation? That's self-care too.Until next week, we hope you can unstuck your muck! 💛📩 Want simple self-care ideas to get you started? Email us at muckedupmyselfcarepodcast@gmail.com and we'll send our favourite five simple ideas.👋 Find Jill @mamaoutspoken and mamaoutspoken.com💬 Connect with Linda @hellolindabonney or lindabonney.com

May 3, 202629 min

How Moms Around the World Do Self-Care

Self-care is universal — every mum on the planet needs it. But what it actually looks like? That part is anything but. In this episode of Mucked Up My Self Care, Linda (Tasmania) and Jill (New York) go bigger than their own backyards and explore how mums around the world live out self-care — and why, in so many Western cultures, it's become the loneliest version of all. From the guilt of resting to the power of a real village, this conversation will have you rethinking everything you thought self-care had to look like.In this episode, you’ll learn:Why self-care looks so different depending on where you live in the worldHow collectivist cultures weave rest into community — without anyone needing to earn itWhy the Western version of self-care can feel so isolating, and what we’re missingWhat a “village” actually means in modern motherhood — and how to start building oneHow mum guilt is shaped by culture, and what it looks like in places where it barely existsSimple, realistic things you can borrow from other cultures to fill the gaps in your own self-careWhy asking one person for something small this week might be the most powerful thing you doSelf-care doesn’t have to look the way you’ve been told it should. Whether your version is an afternoon nap, a slow walk to school, or finally texting that friend to ask for help — it counts. Linda and Jill invite you to look beyond your own backyard, borrow what resonates, and give yourself full permission to build a version of self-care that actually fits your life. The village starts with one small ask. Why not make it this week?Until next week, we hope you can unstuck your muck! 💛📩 Listening from a culture that prioritises rest or community? We’d love to hear from you! Message us at muckedupmyselfcarepodcast@gmail.com👋 Find Jill @mamaoutspoken and mamaoutspoken.com💬 Connect with Linda @hellolindabonney or lindabonney.com

April 5, 202628 min

Why Moms Feel Guilty When Doing Good Things for Themselves

You finally carve out time for yourself...and then spend the whole time feeling terrible about it. Sound familiar? In this episode of Mucked Up My Self-Care, Jill and Linda get real about the guilt loop that keeps so many moms stuck, and why doing something good for yourself can somehow end up feeling so bad. From messy houses and cancelled plans to babysitters, date nights, and the invisible weight of generational conditioning, this conversation is both honest and relatable.In this episode, you'll learn:Why self-care guilt shows up even when you're doing everything "right"How the state of your home can quietly drive your inner criticWhat generational patterns might be keeping you stuck in the guilt loopWhy asking for help and putting yourself first go hand in hand (and why both feel hard)How to notice and name guilt before it talks you out of your self-careThe powerful difference between earning self-care and simply deserving itYou are not a bad mum for taking care of yourself. You're actually a better one for it. Whether you're wrestling with a messy house, a packed schedule, or the nagging voice that says not yet, Jill and Linda remind you that unlearning guilt is a process, and you don't have to do it perfectly to make progress. This week, try swapping "I earned this" for "I deserve this", and see what shifts.Until next week, we hope you can unstuck your muck! 💛📩 Need help figuring out where to start with self-care? Message us at muckedupmyselfcarepodcast@gmail.com and we'll send our favourite five simple ideas.👋 Find Jill @mamaoutspoken and mamaoutspoken.com💬 Connect with Linda @hellolindabonney or lindabonney.com

March 1, 202629 min

What Happens When You Outgrow Yourself and Self-Care?

Growth is rarely linear, and it's almost never pretty. In this season two debut of Mucked Up My Self Care, Jill and Linda are back — and they are not the same women who started this podcast. From pregnancy announcements and pregnancy symptoms to solo parenting four kids 24/7 and navigating grief, this episode is a raw, honest look at what it means to evolve publicly and privately, and what you have to let go of to make room for who you're becoming. If you've ever felt like slowing down means falling behind, this one's for you.In this episode, you'll hear:Why slowing down can actually be the most intentional form of growth — and how Jill and Linda are applying that to the podcast in season twoJill's big announcement: after years of trying, baby number two is on the way — and pregnancy symptoms are no joke the second time aroundWhat it really means to be a solo parent (hint: it's not the same as single parenting) and how Linda is navigating that 100% on her ownHow grief, miscarriage, and massive life shifts shaped the decision to take a break — and why that was one of the smartest moves they've madeThe quarterly check-in strategy that keeps this cross-world collaboration grounded and growingWhy posting less can actually mean doing more — and what season two is going to look likeHow to give yourself permission to outgrow the version of you that got you startedGrowth doesn't always look like doing more. Sometimes it looks like a 3-year-old pouring cereal five times a day while you try to hold it all together — and finding the grace in that chaos anyway. Jill and Linda get vulnerable about the behind-the-scenes moments that nobody sees, the habits and expectations worth letting go of, and why our taste buds regenerating every couple of weeks might just be the best metaphor for self-care growth you'll hear today. You're allowed to outgrow the old version of you. And we're here to hold that space.Until next episode, we hope you can unstuck your muck! 💛📩 What are you giving yourself permission to outgrow? Tell us at muckedupmyselfcarepodcast@gmail.com — we'd love to hear from you!👋 Find Jill @mamaoutspoken and mamaoutspoken.com💬 Connect with Linda @hellolindabonney or lindabonney.com

November 10, 202512 min

A Pause for Self Care

After 125 episodes of real, messy conversations about self-care, Jill and Linda take a moment to pause and reflect. In this episode, they share their weekly highs and lows—celebrating joyful moments like Halloween with family while also navigating the deep grief of losing a loved one. It’s a reminder that life rarely holds just one emotion at a time.They also open up about an important decision for the podcast: taking a seasonal pause. After consistently showing up week after week, they’re giving themselves permission to step back, recharge, and return refreshed in the new year. This conversation is honest, heartfelt, and a powerful reminder that sometimes self-care looks like pressing pause.In this episode, you'll hear:Jill shares joyful Halloween memories with her son—and the heartbreaking news of her father’s passing after his battle with cancer.Linda reflects on the sweet and funny moments of parenting a toddler discovering her voice and personality.The emotional complexity of holding joy and grief at the same time.Why Jill and Linda decided to pause the podcast after 125 weekly episodes.How taking breaks can actually be an essential part of sustainable self-care.What listeners can expect when Mucked Up My Self Care returns next season.Self-care sometimes means pushing through—but other times it means giving yourself permission to pause. Jill and Linda aren’t saying goodbye—they’re simply pressing pause so they can come back refreshed and ready for more honest conversations about motherhood, life, and self-care.Until next season, we hope you can unstuck your muck! 💛📩 Need help figuring out where to start with self-care? Message us at muckedupmyselfcarepodcast@gmail.com and we'll send our favorite simple self-care ideas—no thinking required!👋 Find Jill @mamaoutspoken and mamaoutspoken.com💬 Connect with Linda @hellolindabonney or lindabonney.com

November 2, 202521 min

When Self-Care Feels Selfish

Sometimes self-care feels impossible when life demands everything from us, and that's when we need it most. In this raw and honest episode of Mucked Up My Self Care, Jill and Linda dive into one of the hardest questions moms face: How do we take care of ourselves when others need us more? From navigating terminal illness and anticipatory grief to solo parenting four kids through sickness and cold weather, this conversation gets real about guilt, shortcuts, and the mental load of trying to do it all. If you've ever felt selfish for taking a moment for yourself while others are struggling, this episode is for you.In this episode, you'll hear:Why self-care feels selfish when you're caring for sick or struggling loved ones and how to reframe that guiltHow to take meaningful shortcuts without sacrificing your sanity (hello, skipping pajamas and porridge for dinner!)The difference between being selfish and setting realistic expectations when you're overwhelmedWhy "taking care of yourself too" can feel impossible when someone else's need feels greater than yoursHow to identify who your priority "family" is during crisis seasons and why that mattersWays to combine self-care with caring for others so your cup gets filled while you're still showing upWhat anticipatory grief looks like and why it makes self-care even harder to prioritizeSelf-care doesn't have to be solo or scheduled to count. Whether you're reading while the house gets messier, sharing time with your child during spooky season, or showing up for aging parents while barely holding it together yourself, this episode is a reminder that you're not selfish for needing care too. Jill and Linda get vulnerable about the weight of responsibility, the shortcuts that save them, and why we have to stop waiting for permission to take care of ourselves—even in the hardest seasons.Until next week, we hope you can unstuck your muck! 💛📩 Need help figuring out where to start with self-care? Message us at muckedupmyselfcarepodcast@gmail.com and we'll send our favorite simple self-care ideas—no thinking required!👋 Find Jill @mamaoutspoken and mamaoutspoken.com💬 Connect with Linda @hellolindabonney or lindabonney.com

October 26, 202525 min

Self-Care Through Different Motherhood Stages

Parenting a thirteen-year-old for the first time feels completely different than parenting your four two-year-old—and that's exactly the point. In this vulnerable episode of Mucked Up My Self Care, Jill and Linda explore how self-care shifts and evolves through every stage of motherhood, from pregnancy loss and postpartum preparation to managing preteens, kindergarteners, and everything in between. Through personal stories of hospital scares, garden overwhelm, and the messy reality of trying to control the uncontrollable, they remind us that sometimes the best self-care is simply letting go.In this episode, you'll learn:How self-care needs change dramatically across different parenting stages (and why that's completely normal)Why trying to control too much in motherhood can actually dampen your self-care effortsThe unique challenges of managing multiple ages at once—from preteens leaving empty food packets everywhere to toddlers needing constant attentionHow to navigate self-care during intense seasons: pregnancy, loss, health crises, and emotional heavinessWhy "structured self-care" isn't always the answer—sometimes it's about vegging out on the couch with a bookHow to prepare for postpartum self-care when you've been through it before and know what you needThe power of having a go-to self-care list when you're too overwhelmed to think clearlyWhy giving yourself understanding and grace is essential when parenting any age for the first timeMotherhood doesn't come with a manual, and neither does self-care through its many stages. Whether you're dealing with difficult school drop-offs, preteen messes, pregnancy worries, or just trying to squeeze in half a page of reading before falling asleep, this episode validates the reality that every stage brings new challenges—and new opportunities to care for yourself differently. Jill and Linda's honest conversation reminds you that it's okay when things don't go as planned, and that sometimes the best thing you can do is dance it out, take it one day at a time, and remember: this is the first time you're parenting this exact child at this exact age.Until next week, we hope you can unstuck your muck! 💛📩 Need help figuring out where to start with self-care? Message us at muckedupmyselfcarepodcast@gmail.com and we'll send our favorite simple self-care ideas—no thinking required!👋 Find Jill @mamaoutspoken and mamaoutspoken.com💬 Connect with Linda @hellolindabonney or lindabonney.com

October 19, 202523 min

Disappointed in Your Self-Care?

Sometimes self-care doesn’t look like what we planned, and that’s okay. In this heartfelt episode of Mucked Up My Self Care, Jill and Linda open up about exhaustion, disappointment, and the emotional tug-of-war between expectations and reality. From overpacked schedules and shifting bedtime routines to learning how to “read the room” with your energy, this conversation gets real about what happens when your self-care just doesn’t go the way you hoped and how to show yourself grace in the middle of it.In this episode, you’ll learn:Why self-care can sometimes feel disappointing and what that really meansHow to shift expectations without giving up entirelyWhat “reading the room” looks like for your own energy and capacityHow comparison sneaks into self-care and feeds disappointmentWhy small, intentional moments (like watching your child thrive) still countWays to redefine success in your self-care journeySelf-care doesn’t have to be perfect to be powerful. Whether you’re skipping a workout to rest, choosing frozen pizza over a full meal, or celebrating the small wins, this episode is a reminder that your needs matter - even when life gets messy. Jill and Linda invite you to stop measuring your self-care against expectations and start giving yourself the grace to do what you can, when you can. Until next week, we hope you can unstuck your muck! 💛 📩 Need help figuring out where to start with self-care? Message us at muckedupmyselfcarepodcast@gmail.com and we’ll send our favorite five simple ideas.👋 Find Jill @mamaoutspoken and mamaoutspoken.com💬 Connect with Linda @hellolindabonney or lindabonney.com

October 12, 202529 min

Building Your Village: Support, Self-Care & Survival

The old saying “it takes a village to raise a child” feels harder than ever in today’s world of busy schedules, full calendars, and endless responsibilities. In this episode of Mucked Up My Self Care, Jill and Linda talk highs and lows, the loneliness that can come with motherhood, and the creative ways moms can reimagine community -even when neighbors no longer just “pop by.” From navigating school transitions to finding support in unexpected places, this conversation is all about redefining what a modern-day village looks like.In this episode, you’ll learn:Why highs and lows often happen in the same day and how that emotional “sandwich” feels for momsHow school schedules, activities, and jobs make building community harder than everWhy asking for help is tricky and how to make it easierHow guilt and pressure keep moms from accepting supportThe idea of a “village order form” that takes the decision fatigue out of asking for helpCreative ways moms can team up to share the load (from folding laundry to meal prep playdates) Motherhood was never meant to be a solo act and yet, too many moms are carrying the load alone. Jill and Linda remind us that building a village doesn’t have to look perfect or traditional. Sometimes it’s as simple as one friend showing up to fold laundry, share dinner in the park, or prep meals side by side. If you’ve been craving more support, this episode will leave you with both solidarity and fresh ideas for how to invite community back into your life.Until next week, we hope you can unstuck your muck! 💛 📩 Need help figuring out where to start with self-care? Message us at muckedupmyselfcarepodcast@gmail.com and we’ll send our favorite five simple ideas.👋 Find Jill @mamaoutspoken and mamaoutspoken.com💬 Connect with Linda @hellolindabonney or lindabonney.com

October 5, 202524 min

Self-Care for the Perfectionist: Letting Go of “Perfect” and Finding What Works

What happens when perfectionism sneaks into self-care? In this episode of Mucked Up My Self-Care, Jill and Linda unpack the tension between wanting everything “just right” and the messy reality of motherhood. From waiting for the perfect moment to spiraling into guilt when plans fall apart, they share raw reflections on how perfectionism holds us back and what it looks like to embrace imperfection instead.In this episode, you’ll learn:Why perfectionism and vulnerability don’t play well togetherHow high expectations set us up for frustration and burnoutThe hidden trap of waiting for “perfect timing” before doing self-careWhy nature and movement are powerful (and imperfect) forms of self-careHow rest, even when unplanned, counts as real self-careSimple ways to reset when self-care doesn’t go as planned Self-care isn’t about picture-perfect timing or flawless execution; it’s about meeting yourself where you are. Jill and Linda remind us that sometimes the most powerful form of care is letting go of expectations and embracing the imperfect options in front of you. If you’ve ever delayed self-care because the stars didn’t align, this episode will help you reset, refocus, and take the pressure off. Until next week, we hope you can unstuck your muck! 💛 📩 Need help figuring out where to start with self-care? Message us at muckedupmyselfcarepodcast@gmail.com and we’ll send our favorite five simple ideas.👋 Find Jill @mamaoutspoken and mamaoutspoken.com💬 Connect with Linda @hellolindabonney or lindabonney.com