How to Get What You Want

Hosted by Susie Tomenchok

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Episodes

216

Latest episode

Nov 2026

Language

EN-US

About the show

You already know what you want. The question is, do you know how to get it? On How to Get What You Want , Susie Tomenchok shows you how to navigate the moments at work that actually determine your career. The conversations, decisions, and situations where what you say and how you show up shapes your career growth, leadership presence, and professional advancement. Because getting what you want isn’t about being louder or more aggressive. It’s about how you think, how you position yourself, and how you handle those moments at work. And whether you call it that or not, that’s negotiation. Not the kind that feels pushy or uncomfortable. The everyday kind you’re already in. When you decide to speak up in a meeting When you ask for an opportunity When you handle workplace conflict When you position your ideas and advocate for your value Each week, Susie breaks down real workplace scenarios, communication strategies, and mindset shifts so you can stop second-guessing yourself and start getting what you want in your career and your life.

Listen to episodes

60 recent

November 3, 2026Episode 21719 min

How AI Is Changing the Way Your Team Judges You

Send us Fan Mail Your team has been told to use AI more, and most of them are. But I’m guessing there hasn’t been much discussion about what’s accepted and what isn't. Now you’re getting work that looks really polished. For example, a deck or a report that looks visually finished, but when you read it, there isn’t a lot of thinking behind it. Researchers call it workslop. And once you see it, it changes how competent that person looks to you and what you’re willing to hand them next. Navigating this situation is negotiation. How you respond when that work lands on your desk is a decision, and it affects your team well beyond one deck. In this episode, I’ll cover: See why polished work can tell you less than a rough draft Understand what managers are absorbing that their teams never see Spot the cost hiding inside “use AI more” 🎯 Done feeling overlooked while you watch others move forward? Executive coaching helps you advocate for yourself, get clear on where you're going, and take ownership of your next step. Book your call here: https://calendly.com/susietomenchok/new-meeting _____________________ 🚀 Ready to Get What You Want? Listening is great, but real change happens when you take action. Join my newsletter for exclusive negotiation strategies, scripts, and real-world case studies you won’t hear on the podcast. Sign up now at www.negotiationlove.com —it takes 10 seconds and will change how you view and negotiate forever. 📖 Continue Your Professional Growth with These Resources: Get my Book: The Art of Everyday Negotiation without Manipulation: www.susietomenchok.com/our-book--the-art-of-negotiation Learn more about booking me for a workshop: www.susietomenchok.com/workshops-and-training _____________________ Remember, negotiation is more than a skill—it’s a mindset. 💕Susie www.linkedin.com/in/susietomenchok

October 27, 2026Episode 21620 min

Would You Sign Your Name to It?

Send us Fan Mail An anonymous letter to a new CEO started making its way around a Fortune 50 company. It wasn’t trashing anyone. It said exactly what people were already feeling, and they couldn’t stop forwarding it. That isn’t office gossip. When people pass something like that along, they’re trying to get their view in front of someone who can change things. That’s a negotiation. It also raises a harder question about what happens to trust when everyone is quietly waiting for the top to fix it. And if you were the one writing that letter, would you sign your name to it? In this episode, I’ll cover: Find out why most executives keep problems from reaching the top See what wait-and-see mode does to the way leaders listen Learn the part you play in culture, even when you don’t feel in control 🎯 Done feeling overlooked while you watch others move forward? Executive coaching helps you advocate for yourself, get clear on where you're going, and take ownership of your next step. Book your call here: https://calendly.com/susietomenchok/new-meeting _____________________ 🚀 Ready to Get What You Want? Listening is great, but real change happens when you take action. Join my newsletter for exclusive negotiation strategies, scripts, and real-world case studies you won’t hear on the podcast. Sign up now at www.negotiationlove.com —it takes 10 seconds and will change how you view and negotiate forever. 📖 Continue Your Professional Growth with These Resources: Get my Book: The Art of Everyday Negotiation without Manipulation: www.susietomenchok.com/our-book--the-art-of-negotiation Learn more about booking me for a workshop: www.susietomenchok.com/workshops-and-training _____________________ Remember, negotiation is more than a skill—it’s a mindset. 💕Susie www.linkedin.com/in/susietomenchok

October 20, 2026Episode 21514 min

You're Negotiating More Often Than You Think

Send us Fan Mail Most of the negotiations that shape your week never get called negotiations. It could be as simple as someone asking for your time or your help, and you say yes before you've really thought it through. It happens on autopilot, but it costs you more than you'd guess. Once you start seeing these everyday exchanges as negotiations, you get a choice you didn't have before. And sometimes the negotiation is coming from the last people you'd suspect. I found out years later that a full strategy had been running on me every single week at Target, and I never saw it coming. In this episode, I'll cover: Spotting the strategies people use on you in everyday moments How to frame your ask so people are more likely to say yes When to use an underrated skill to change how people listen to you 🎯 Done feeling overlooked while you watch others move forward? Executive coaching helps you advocate for yourself, get clear on where you're going, and take ownership of your next step. Book your call here: https://calendly.com/susietomenchok/new-meeting _____________________ 🚀 Ready to Get What You Want? Listening is great, but real change happens when you take action. Join my newsletter for exclusive negotiation strategies, scripts, and real-world case studies you won’t hear on the podcast. Sign up now at www.negotiationlove.com —it takes 10 seconds and will change how you view and negotiate forever. 📖 Continue Your Professional Growth with These Resources: Get my Book: The Art of Everyday Negotiation without Manipulation: www.susietomenchok.com/our-book--the-art-of-negotiation Learn more about booking me for a workshop: www.susietomenchok.com/workshops-and-training _____________________ Remember, negotiation is more than a skill—it’s a mindset. 💕Susie www.linkedin.com/in/susietomenchok

October 13, 2026Episode 21415 min

The Part of Your Reputation You Can't See From the Inside

Send us Fan Mail Your results are only part of how you're judged at work. The other part is how people experience you, and you can't see that piece clearly on your own. That perception builds over time, long before the high-stakes meeting. It shapes who gets trusted with the stretch assignment or gets asked to lead the project. That makes it a negotiation, even when nobody is sitting across the table from you. You probably assume you already know how you come across. The research says otherwise. And once you start gathering real data, the gap might not run in the direction you expect. In this episode, I'll cover: Recognize which kind of self-awareness you're missing Gather honest feedback on how you came across without getting defensive Use small, everyday moments to shape how people see you 🎯 Done feeling overlooked while you watch others move forward? Executive coaching helps you advocate for yourself, get clear on where you're going, and take ownership of your next step. Book your call here: https://calendly.com/susietomenchok/new-meeting _____________________ 🚀 Ready to Get What You Want? Listening is great, but real change happens when you take action. Join my newsletter for exclusive negotiation strategies, scripts, and real-world case studies you won’t hear on the podcast. Sign up now at www.negotiationlove.com —it takes 10 seconds and will change how you view and negotiate forever. 📖 Continue Your Professional Growth with These Resources: Get my Book: The Art of Everyday Negotiation without Manipulation: www.susietomenchok.com/our-book--the-art-of-negotiation Learn more about booking me for a workshop: www.susietomenchok.com/workshops-and-training _____________________ Remember, negotiation is more than a skill—it’s a mindset. 💕Susie www.linkedin.com/in/susietomenchok

October 6, 2026Episode 21320 min

How to Ask for More When Budgets Are Tight

Send us Fan Mail This is the question I get more than any other. How do I ask for more money? And right now, with budgets tight all over, it feels even harder. I'll be honest with you. There's no silver bullet. But I think "it's not in the budget" has become an easy out, and too many people hear it and walk away. I don't want that to be you. Asking for more is a negotiation, and it starts long before you walk into that meeting. When you understand what's important to the person on the other side, no becomes a starting point. That's where you get curious. In this episode, I'll cover: Know when to ask, and why waiting can cost you Find out which rules at work aren't as laminated as you think Bring real confidence into the room, without making a single threat 🎯 Done feeling overlooked while you watch others move forward? Executive coaching helps you advocate for yourself, get clear on where you're going, and take ownership of your next step. Book your call here: https://calendly.com/susietomenchok/new-meeting _____________________ 🚀 Ready to Get What You Want? Listening is great, but real change happens when you take action. Join my newsletter for exclusive negotiation strategies, scripts, and real-world case studies you won’t hear on the podcast. Sign up now at www.negotiationlove.com —it takes 10 seconds and will change how you view and negotiate forever. 📖 Continue Your Professional Growth with These Resources: Get my Book: The Art of Everyday Negotiation without Manipulation: www.susietomenchok.com/our-book--the-art-of-negotiation Learn more about booking me for a workshop: www.susietomenchok.com/workshops-and-training _____________________ Remember, negotiation is more than a skill—it’s a mindset. 💕Susie www.linkedin.com/in/susietomenchok

September 29, 2026Episode 21216 min

What To Do When Someone Senior Promises Help and Then Goes Silent

Send us Fan Mail A senior leader says they would love to help, promises introductions and resources, and then goes quiet. You follow up and hear nothing. It is easy to start combing through what you did wrong. It's natural that most of us treat this as a problem on our end. But it's actually a negotiation. You need something from someone who has no obligation to give it and no urgency of their own, and how you handle that gap decides whether you get the support you were promised. This episode is about shifting from wondering what you did wrong to asking what in the situation needs to change. In this episode, I'll cover: Stop reading someone else's silence as a verdict on you See why a warm yes in the room doesn't always become action Rethink what your follow-up is actually there to do 🎯 Done feeling overlooked while you watch others move forward? Executive coaching helps you advocate for yourself, get clear on where you're going, and take ownership of your next step. Book your call here: https://calendly.com/susietomenchok/new-meeting _____________________ 🚀 Ready to Get What You Want? Listening is great, but real change happens when you take action. Join my newsletter for exclusive negotiation strategies, scripts, and real-world case studies you won’t hear on the podcast. Sign up now at www.negotiationlove.com —it takes 10 seconds and will change how you view and negotiate forever. 📖 Continue Your Professional Growth with These Resources: Get my Book: The Art of Everyday Negotiation without Manipulation: www.susietomenchok.com/our-book--the-art-of-negotiation Learn more about booking me for a workshop: www.susietomenchok.com/workshops-and-training _____________________ Remember, negotiation is more than a skill—it’s a mindset. 💕Susie www.linkedin.com/in/susietomenchok

September 22, 2026Episode 21116 min

Afraid Your Boss Will Say No? How to Make the Ask Anyway

Send us Fan Mail You're afraid your boss will say no, so the ask stays in your head. You've been carrying it around for a long time, and you've already written their answer for them. I'm sharing why the answer you're bracing for may not be the one you get, and how to make the ask anyway in a way that makes a yes more likely. It comes down to a few small choices, and most of them happen after you've said the words. In this episode, I'll cover: Catch the habit that quietly weakens a strong ask Give your boss what they need to get to yes Rethink what a no actually means for your next ask 🎯 Done feeling overlooked while you watch others move forward? Executive coaching helps you advocate for yourself, get clear on where you're going, and take ownership of your next step. Book your call here: https://calendly.com/susietomenchok/new-meeting _____________________ 🚀 Ready to Get What You Want? Listening is great, but real change happens when you take action. Join my newsletter for exclusive negotiation strategies, scripts, and real-world case studies you won’t hear on the podcast. Sign up now at www.negotiationlove.com —it takes 10 seconds and will change how you view and negotiate forever. 📖 Continue Your Professional Growth with These Resources: Get my Book: The Art of Everyday Negotiation without Manipulation: www.susietomenchok.com/our-book--the-art-of-negotiation Learn more about booking me for a workshop: www.susietomenchok.com/workshops-and-training _____________________ Remember, negotiation is more than a skill—it’s a mindset. 💕Susie www.linkedin.com/in/susietomenchok

September 15, 2026Episode 21015 min

What Changes the Day You Get Promoted

Send us Fan Mail You get the promotion and then you show up to your staff meeting, run your one-on-ones, and jump in to solve problems exactly like you always have. You're waiting for the title to do the work of changing how people see you. Weeks go by and nothing shifts. And it's not them...it's you. The room doesn't change until you do. That's the negotiation lens most people miss when they think about leadership. You're setting terms with everyone around you every single day, whether you mean to or not. I'm walking you through the three shifts that actually move the needle, and the first one has nothing to do with your title at all. In this episode, I'll cover: What you need to say to your team before anything else can shift The habit in your one-on-ones you didn't realize was working against you How to borrow someone else's leadership style without losing your own 🎯 Done feeling overlooked while you watch others move forward? Executive coaching helps you advocate for yourself, get clear on where you're going, and take ownership of your next step. Book your call here: https://calendly.com/susietomenchok/new-meeting _____________________ 🚀 Ready to Get What You Want? Listening is great, but real change happens when you take action. Join my newsletter for exclusive negotiation strategies, scripts, and real-world case studies you won’t hear on the podcast. Sign up now at www.negotiationlove.com —it takes 10 seconds and will change how you view and negotiate forever. 📖 Continue Your Professional Growth with These Resources: Get my Book: The Art of Everyday Negotiation without Manipulation: www.susietomenchok.com/our-book--the-art-of-negotiation Learn more about booking me for a workshop: www.susietomenchok.com/workshops-and-training _____________________ Remember, negotiation is more than a skill—it’s a mindset. 💕Susie www.linkedin.com/in/susietomenchok

September 8, 2026Episode 20920 min

Why "You're So Confusing" Became the Best Feedback I Got

Send us Fan Mail "You're really confusing." That's what my boss told me one day, out of nowhere, with no explanation or context. I spent weeks questioning whether I was even good at my job. Then I watched someone else say almost the exact same thing to her, and she understood it instantly. The problem was never how smart I was. It was how I set her up to hear it. This week I'm breaking down what changed once I saw that difference, and why framing the way people hear you decides whether you get what you want. In this episode, I'll cover: Recognize why confusion isn't about intelligence, it's about missing context Set up your ideas so people can actually follow you Ask a real question at the end that keeps you in control of where the conversation goes 🎯 Done feeling overlooked while you watch others move forward? Executive coaching helps you advocate for yourself, get clear on where you're going, and take ownership of your next step. Book your call here: https://calendly.com/susietomenchok/new-meeting _____________________ 🚀 Ready to Get What You Want? Listening is great, but real change happens when you take action. Join my newsletter for exclusive negotiation strategies, scripts, and real-world case studies you won’t hear on the podcast. Sign up now at www.negotiationlove.com —it takes 10 seconds and will change how you view and negotiate forever. 📖 Continue Your Professional Growth with These Resources: Get my Book: The Art of Everyday Negotiation without Manipulation: www.susietomenchok.com/our-book--the-art-of-negotiation Learn more about booking me for a workshop: www.susietomenchok.com/workshops-and-training _____________________ Remember, negotiation is more than a skill—it’s a mindset. 💕Susie www.linkedin.com/in/susietomenchok

September 1, 2026Episode 20823 min

Starting Over With Josh and Jennifer After They Left Corporate

Send us Fan Mail This is part two of my conversation with Josh and Jennifer, two former executives who left corporate leadership to build their own businesses. If you haven't heard part one, start there, we spent that episode looking back at their years running big, complex organizations. In this episode, we look at what it felt like to walk away and build something of their own. Josh talks about the identity he didn't realize was wrapped up in the company he left. Jennifer walks through the slow build toward her own business, and what changed once she got clear on what to say yes and no to. We also talk about what surprised them most about themselves once the title and the office were gone. In this episode, I'll cover: Hear what it took to separate their identity from the company they built their career around Learn what actually created stability once the paycheck and structure were gone Discover what surprised them most about who they became once they stopped performing for someone else Connect with Jennifer Bergman: www.linkedin.com/in/jenniferjbergman Connect with Josh Seiden: www.linkedin.com/in/joshuaseiden 🎯 Done feeling overlooked while you watch others move forward? Executive coaching helps you advocate for yourself, get clear on where you're going, and take ownership of your next step. Book your call here: https://calendly.com/susietomenchok/new-meeting _____________________ 🚀 Ready to Get What You Want? Listening is great, but real change happens when you take action. Join my newsletter for exclusive negotiation strategies, scripts, and real-world case studies you won’t hear on the podcast. Sign up now at www.negotiationlove.com —it takes 10 seconds and will change how you view and negotiate forever. 📖 Continue Your Professional Growth with These Resources: Get my Book: The Art of Everyday Negotiation without Manipulation: www.susietomenchok.com/our-book--the-art-of-negotiation Learn more about booking me for a workshop: www.susietomenchok.com/workshops-and-training _____________________ Remember, negotiation is more than a skill—it’s a mindset. 💕Susie www.linkedin.com/in/susietomenchok