One Word Almost Cost Me Everything. How to Rewrite Your Life Story.
One word had an outsized influence on my life story. That word is depression. Diagnosed at 19, I carried that word around like a guilty verdict for 20 years. A word that became the central theme in the story I was living. My story’s theme became a sentence. Depression became my label and my excuse. “I can’t help it,” I’d say after making a poor decision. And I believed it. Because four people told me so. First, a nurse. Then a therapist, a psychiatrist, and a second therapist. All of them experts with diplomas and credentials. Hearing the same word over and over again shaped an identity. Because language is contagious. It works like a virus, traveling from person to person. From expert to teenager. In my case, four experts, later reinforced by three more. Depression was running wild in the background, authoring my decisions and shaping my choices. I was living a story I didn’t write. I was the narrator in the expert’s story, using their labels to define me. Meanwhile, I had a successful radio career. Awards, accolades, and ratings increases. None of it shifted the story. Because the same thoughts were running on repeat. Radio stations play the hits. My records on repeat were “You aren’t good enough.” “You can’t help it. This is just who you are, who you always be.” “This is something you’ll have to manage forever.” That’s what they told me. Then one afternoon in Los Angeles, six words freed me from that 20-year sentence. A different sentence that set me free. “Your thoughts are not your own.” A woman named Mary Morrissey said that from a stage in Los Angeles. I was sitting toward the back of the room. I didn’t understand it at first. But she went on to explain that you pick up words from experts, family, marketing, and culture. Those words take root. They start influencing your decisions. Decisions shape your story. This sentence was like a verdict getting overturned. Because if those thoughts weren’t mine, the story wasn’t mine either. And if the story wasn’t mine, I could write a different one. That’s exactly what I did. This episode of Equal Matters is about that journey. Living a story through the Depression Era in America. An industry that started in 1987. An era that still hasn’t ended. Therapy is a $100 billion industry. 45 million Americans are on antidepressants. And the industry keeps generating new words to influence people’s stories the way depression influenced mine. Words like toxic, trauma, and triggered. Words like narcissist, gaslighting, and neurodivergent. For 20 years, I lived inside someone else’s language. Depression was the main character of my story. I was playing a supporting role in my own life. Until I stepped into the role that was always mine. The main character that shapes the world around him, rather than waiting for the world to shape me. No matter what’s happening in the world, I still have to live in it. And since I’m writing the story, I’m in charge. This episode is personal. It’s real. And if you’ve ever used a label to explain away a decision you’re not proud of, you’ll find yourself in good company. Share Watch now and share this with a friend. Cheers. -Rob
