211. How to Write About What Didn't Go Well in a Performance Review
Should the hard parts of your year go in your self-assessment? In this Monday Momentum episode of Communicate to Lead, Kele Belton closes the October series with the part of the year most people intentionally leave out. Quick Answer Add a short section to your preparation notes with three things from this year that didn’t go as planned, two lines each: what happened, and what you changed because of it. Keep it to finished situations. Writing it down and saying it out loud are two separate decisions, and the second one is yours to make later. A director Kele worked with had a beautiful record. Specific, well-organized months of work in it. When she asked where the hard parts of the year were, she looked at Kele like she’d lost her mind. The project that stalled, the hire that didn’t work out, none of it was in there. Her words were, why would I hand my manager ammunition? Months later, she came back and said she’d added one entry before her review. One project that slipped, and what she’d changed because of it. That entry was what her manager spent the most time on. Twenty minutes on the one entry she almost left out, not because it exposed her, but because it showed her thinking better than anything else in her record. Kele separates the decision to write something down from the decision to say it out loud, explains why judgment is harder to demonstrate than competence and counts for more, and gives you a two-line format for three entries, plus the one caution about what does not belong in this section. This is Part 4, the finale of the four-part series “Build Your Case Before December.” What You Will Learn Why writing something down and saying it out loud are two separate decisions — and why the writing pays off either way. What a record made entirely of wins signals to the person reading it. Why senior leadership is looking for someone who notices and adjusts rather than someone who always gets it right. The two-line format — and why the second line is where all the weight sits. The difference between airing something and owning it. The one caution: what does not belong in this section, and why finished situations only. Who This Is For This episode is for high-performing women in middle and senior management who have built a record of their year and are deciding whether the hard parts belong in it. It’s also for anyone who has opened a self-assessment, hovered over the honest answer, and written something safer instead. Your Action Step Open your notes and add the section, then put one thing in it: the one you already thought of. Two lines. What happened, and what you changed because of it. Common Questions About Writing About Setbacks at Work Should I include mistakes in my self-assessment? Write them down, yes — but keep two documents distinct: your own preparation notes, and what you submit. Saying something out loud is a separate decision you make later, and the writing pays off either way. If your workplace isn’t safe for that conversation, you still want the specifics on paper, because you cannot describe in a review what you never wrote down. How do I talk about a failure in a performance review? In two lines: what happened, and what you changed because of it. What happened on its own is a confession. What you changed is what makes it leadership. Lead with the change and keep the setback short. The episode shows how to do that well, without over-apologizing or sounding rehearsed. How many things should the lessons section include? In Kele’s exercise: three entries, no more, and only situations that are finished. Skip anything still unresolved and anything that was someone else’s mistake, and don’t use the section to be hard on yourself. If nothing comes to mind, scroll back through your calendar, because the weeks that went sideways are where to look. Isn’t it risky to put what went wrong in writing? It can be, depending on who can access the record and how your workplace handles mistakes. Preparing an example and including it in a formal self-assessment are separate decisions, and no format guarantees a particular response. That said, a record made entirely of wins carries its own risk, because it reads like a highlight reel and invites the question of what got left out. What distinguishes a senior candidate is being able to describe what she noticed and what she adjusted, and that only works if it was written down at the time. AI Prompt: Review Your Lessons Entry After you listen, draft your own two-line entry, then use this prompt to review it. Remove names, employer details and anything confidential before you paste anything into an AI tool. You are my executive communication coach. Below is my draft entry for the lessons section of my year-end review preparation: what happened, and what I changed because of it. Review it for: (1) whether the second line carries more weight than the first, so the entry reads as judgment rather than a confession; (2) whether it is factual and forward-facing, with no self-criticism, apology, blame, or hedging language like “just,” “a little,” or “I probably should have”; (3) whether it describes a finished situation rather than something still unresolved. Do not invent facts, outcomes, numbers or quotes; if information is missing, ask me one question at a time. Then help me tighten the two lines and write one spoken sentence I could say out loud if I am asked about a challenge this year, in my own voice. Ready to Go Deeper? Ready to turn a year of work into the conversation that moves your career forward? A complimentary Leadership Strategy Call with Kele is a chance to talk about where you are, where you want to go, and what it’ll take to get there. Book your complimentary Leadership Strategy Call About Your Host Kele Belton is a communication and leadership facilitator, coach, and consultant, and the host of Communicate to Lead. Through her company, The Tailored Approach, she helps high-performing women in middle and senior management move from essential but invisible to seen, sponsored, and promoted. Connect With Kele LinkedIn: Kele Belton Instagram: @thetailoredapproach Website: The Tailored Approach

