You're Overqualified Podcast - Career and Leadership Strategies for Women

Hosted by Dani Tan - Leadership Coach and Speaker

Business Careers

Website RSS feed

Episodes

146

Latest episode

Jun 2026

Language

EN-US

About the show

I'm Dani Tan, Founder and leadership coach of She Belongs Here™, a leadership and culture organization for women ready to get promoted, lead on their own terms, and redefine what leadership looks like. I coach high-achieving women through the strategy, visibility, and positioning moves that actually move the needle, and I work with organizations building cultures where their best talent can lead. Former VP, first-gen, 11 promotions in 11 years, I've lived this work before I built it. Learn more about me and my mission at danitan.com

Listen to episodes

60 recent

June 12, 2026Episode 13019 min

130. Why You're Still Stuck Even Though You're Doing Everything Right

In episode 130, we're talking about why you can be doing everything right and still feel completely stuck.You are not the problem. The women I work with are smart, driven, ambitious, and high-achieving. They have strong performance reviews. They are doing everything right. And they are stuck. Not because they are not working hard enough. Because what got them here will not get them there. And most of the time, the specific thing keeping them at their current level is something they cannot see on their own.In this episode, I break down the three most common blockers keeping high achievers stuck, why your manager is not the sole person who gets you promoted, and why more information is not what closes this gap.In this episode, I cover:→ Why doing more is working against you at a certain career level→ The bubble problem: why only your manager knowing your work is keeping you stuck→ Why your manager is not the sole decision maker in your promotion→ The difference between research mode and action that actually moves you forward→ What one client did in four sessions that she could not do in two years on her ownKey Takeaways:– What has served you to get here will not serve you to get to the next level. A new strategy is required.– Your manager is not the sole person who gets you promoted. Multiple decision makers are part of that process.– The most expensive thing you can do is stay stuck another year doing the same thing on your own.– The gap is not information. The gap is perspective. You need someone who can see what you cannot see.– Coaching builds a plan custom to your specific manager, your organization, and your goals. That is what moves you forward.Chapters:00:01 Who this podcast is for and why you are overqualified02:10 Why you are stuck even when you are doing everything right04:34 Why doing more is not working at a certain level06:56 Your manager is not the sole person who gets you promoted09:15 Three things to do differently starting now11:33 Why research mode keeps you stuck and what closes the gap13:56 Client story: stuck two years, promoted within six months16:17 The difference between a coach, a therapist, and a mentor18:36 What working together looks like and how to book your callHow to work together - book a call or DM with questions on IG or LI. Book a Discovery Call ⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠ to learn what it's like to work togetherConnect and DM on LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect and DM on IG: ⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/danitani/⁠⁠⁠My site: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

June 6, 2026Episode 12921 min

129. How to Say No at Work Without Blowing Up Your Career

In episode 129, we're talking about how to say no at work without it costing you your career, your credibility, or your peace.You have been rewarded for saying yes. It's gotten you promoted, recognized, and into the room. So it makes sense that saying no feels dangerous. This episode is for the high achievers, especially women, women of color, and first-gen professionals, who know they need to start saying no and just need the language to do it.In this episode, I break down The Three No's, the exact framework I walked my private coaching clients through in a recent workshop, plus how to hold your position when someone keeps pushing back.In this episode, I cover:→ Why high achievers struggle to say no (it's conditioning, not weakness)→ The three types of no: the hard no, the redirect, and the negotiated no→ What to do when a one-time ask becomes a pattern→ How to make your trade-offs visible instead of just absorbing more work→ What to say when someone won't take no for an answerKey Takeaways:No is not the opposite of ambition. No is what ambition looks like when you have a strategy.Saying yes to everything gets you labeled as execution. Saying no strategically gets you seen as a leader.You do not have to answer in real time. Pausing before you commit is a skill.When a favor becomes a pattern, it needs a direct conversation, not another yes.Chapters:00:00 Why ambitious women struggle to say no02:23 What Dani's private client workshop revealed04:39 When work gets offloaded onto you that isn't yours06:52 Being conditioned to say yes (and what it costs you)09:49 The Three No's: hard no, redirect, and negotiated no12:11 When it stops being a favor and becomes a pattern14:28 Pause before you dive in (you don't have to answer in real time)16:49 Managing a micromanager: the Slack response strategy19:10 How saying no kept one client safe through three rounds of layoffs21:23 Transitioning from executor to strategic leader23:27 What it's like to work with Dani and how to book a callHow to work together - book a call or DM with questions on IG or LI. Book a Discovery Call ⁠⁠here⁠⁠ to learn what it's like to work togetherConnect and DM on LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect and DM on IG: ⁠⁠www.instagram.com/danitani/⁠⁠My site: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

May 28, 2026Episode 321 min

128. When Fear Sounds Like Logic: How Ambitious Women Talk Themselves Out of What They Want

In episode 128, we're talking about why fear doesn't always look like fear and how high-achieving women in leadership and career growth quietly talk themselves out of what they want by calling it logic.I'm coming in hot with this one: fear is sneaky. It doesn't show up as panic. It shows up as "the timing isn't right" or "I need a little more experience first" or "what if I apply and I don't get it?" And because it sounds that reasonable? We believe it. We stay. We call it being smart.In this conversation, I break down how fear disguises itself as logic, how to tell the difference between fear and intuition, and how to use the evidence ladder framework to build the case for what you actually want, so fear stops winning the argument.In this episode, I cover:→ Why fear sounds like wisdom for ambitious women and high achievers and why that's exactly the problem→ The difference between fear and intuition and how to tell them apart in your own body→ The real reason successful women stay quiet in meetings, skip the promotion conversation, or don't ask for the salary they deserve→ The evidence ladder framework: how to build a case against your own limiting beliefs→ Why your current career decisions might be running on old data from people who no longer deserve that much powerKey Takeaways:→ Fear shows up as practical-sounding reasons and that's what makes it so sneaky for high achievers→ If you can't find real evidence that your fear is true, it's not data. It's a story you're telling yourself→ Confidence doesn't come before action. It comes from action→ You are not your sixth-grade self. Stop giving outdated feedback that much power→ You built safety and abundance for yourself. Now you get to choose from that place, not from survivalChapters:00:00 Introduction & Welcome02:20 Fear vs. Logic: What's Really Happening04:34 Why Familiar Feels Safe (Even When It's Keeping You Stuck)06:59 Fear vs. Intuition: How to Tell the Difference09:21 The Client Story: When "Not Wanting to Overstep" Is Actually Fear11:47 The Evidence Ladder Framework14:05 Integrating Your Evidence (Yes, Brainwash Yourself)16:26 Where Your Beliefs Actually Come From18:47 From Survival Mode to Abundance21:06 Closing and Working TogetherHow to work together - book a call or DM with questions on IG or LI. Book a Discovery Call ⁠here⁠ to learn what it's like to work togetherConnect and DM on LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect and DM on IG: ⁠www.instagram.com/danitani/⁠My site: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

May 22, 2026Episode 318 min

127. Why Successful Women Ask for Help (And Don't Talk About It)

In episode 127, we're talking about why the most successful women in leadership and business have help and why nobody's talking about it.I'm coming in hot with this one: figuring it out alone is not the flex we think it is. The coaches, the mentors, the tutors, the specialists — it's all there for the high-achieving women winning around you. It's just quiet. And it's time we talked about it.In this conversation, I break down the real cost of going it alone, the mental load ambitious women carry silently, the invisible ceiling you hit when independence stops working, and what becomes possible for your career growth when you finally let someone into your corner.In this episode, I cover:→ Why "I'll figure it out myself" is a liability disguised as a badge of honor and what it's really costing your career advancement→ The difference between a cost and an investment in yourself and why the most successful women think differently about this→ What it means to hit your independent ceiling as a high achiever and how to recognize when you're there→ Why the skills and habits that got you here won't take you to your next level in leadership or business→ The real reason successful women, especially women of color, have coaches and mentors and just don't talk about itKey Takeaways:→ Independence was a survival tool and you have outgrown survival mode→ The cost of going it alone isn't just time. It's the mental load and the ceiling you hit in silence→ Investing in coaching or mentorship is a return on investment: in time, career growth, momentum, and income→ The person to learn from is always someone who has already lived what you want→ You were never meant to figure this out alone and the women who win know thatChapters:00:00 Introduction & Welcome02:21 The Cost of Going It Alone04:37 The Client Who Almost Said No to Help06:59 Why "I'll Figure It Out" Is a Liability09:18 The ACT Tutor Story — How Getting Help Changed Everything11:39 Reframing Cost as Investment13:51 Hitting Your Independent Ceiling16:01 Breaking Out of the Bubble18:24 What Private Coaching Looks Like20:38 Closing — Summer Spots Are OpenHow to work together - book a call or DM with questions on IG or LI. Book a Discovery Call here to learn what it's like to work togetherConnect and DM on LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect and DM on IG: www.instagram.com/danitani/My site: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

May 16, 2026Episode 120 min

126. How to Make Your Work Visible Without Feeling Like You're Bragging

In episode 126, we're talking about how to make your work visible without feeling like you're bragging.You are the person everyone calls when something needs to get done. You deliver, you over-deliver, and you do it every single time. And yet when it comes to getting promoted, getting recognized, or moving up, something is not adding up. This episode is about why that happens and exactly what to do about it.Because here is the truth: letting your work speak for itself is not a strategy. It is invisible excellence. And invisible excellence does not get promoted.In this episode, I cover:→ Why staying quiet is actually signaling to leadership that you are not ready to move up→ How to keep the receipts: building a living document of evidence that makes the case for you→ Executive updates and why your manager alone cannot be the only person who knows what you do→ The roadshow: how to build cross-functional visibility so the right people are advocating for you before you ever ask→ Why visibility is not bragging — it is giving decision makers the data they need to advocate for youKey Takeaways:– Hard work alone will not get you promoted — visibility is the missing piece– Staying quiet signals to leadership that you are comfortable where you are– Visibility is a skill you can learn, practice, and make work in a way that feels like you– Keep the receipts every week, not just at review time– You are not bragging. You are sharing data. There is a difference.Chapters:00:01 Introduction02:18 Why Hard Work Alone Is Not Enough04:29 Letting Your Work Speak for Itself Is a Lie06:50 Visibility Is Not Ego — It Is Information09:09 Strategy 1: Keep the Receipts11:15 Strategy 2: Executive Updates and Ecosystem Mapping13:34 Strategy 3: The Roadshow and Cross-Functional Relationships15:46 Client Stories and What Visibility Actually Produces17:55 What Coaching Looks Like and How We Build This Together20:17 CTA and ClosingGo to my website to book a discovery call and learn what it's like to work together. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

April 30, 2026Episode 12514 min

125. How to Translate Your Work Experience Into a Business (No Matter What Industry You're In)

In episode 125, we're talking about how to translate your work experience into a business, no matter what industry you're in.You have been the person everyone calls when something is on fire. When the system does not exist, you build it. When the team is not performing, you fix it. When there is no answer, your name is the first one that comes up. And every single one of those moments has been building something. Just not yet for you.In this episode, I break down how to take the skills and experience you have built, whether you are in corporate, nonprofit, tech, retail, or anywhere else, and translate them into a business of your own.In this episode, I cover:→ How to recognize that what people always come to you for is actually your business foundation→ The skills recon: how to take inventory of what you know and what it is actually worth→ Why your experience in any industry is more transferable than you think→ How to start with what you know and let the business evolve from there→ Why building a business is not selfish, even if you come from a mission-driven nonprofit backgroundKey Takeaways:– Every role you have ever had has been building skills and experience you can now leverage for yourself– The thing that feels like general knowledge to you is someone else's biggest blind spot– You do not have to burn it all down or quit your job to start building something– Start with what you know and let it evolve– If you cannot shake the idea of building something for yourself, that is your signalChapters:00:01 Introduction01:00 Today's Topic: Translating Your Work Experience Into a Business02:14 The Signal: You're Always the One Everyone Calls03:30 Your Experience Is Not Wasted — It's Your Foundation04:27 The Skills Recon: Taking Inventory of What You Know06:44 Nonprofit, Corporate, Tech, Retail — It All Translates08:54 How This Works in Private Coaching10:00 Client Stories: Health Tech, Creative Artistry, Nonprofit Web Design11:07 Your Why and Building for Yourself13:23 CTA and ClosingLearn more and stay connected:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

April 24, 2026Episode 12417 min

124. Why You Don't Have to Quit Your Job to Start Your Business

In episode 124, we're talking about why you don't have to quit your job to start your business.If you have been thinking about building something of your own but the idea of leaving your paycheck, your benefits, and your security feels too scary to actually move, this episode is for you. You do not have to choose between your 9-5 and your business. Your 9-5 might be the smartest tool you have to launch it.In this episode, I break down how to use your current income strategically to fund your business, build your exit plan, and start from a place of safety instead of desperation.In this episode, I cover:→ How to create an exit strategy with two real target dates and a savings plan that actually makes sense→ Why your paycheck gives you an experimentation runway that full-time entrepreneurs don't have→ The number one reason businesses fail and why knowing your numbers changes everything→ Why you should invest in learning how to make money before anything else→ The mindset work nobody talks about and how your income can fund the support you needKey Takeaways:– You do not have to go all in without a plan– Set two target exit dates and build real savings goals for both personal and business reserves– Save every dollar your business makes early on and let your salary fund your personal security– Your 9-5 gives you breathing room to experiment without every decision feeling like life or death– If time has passed and you have not hit your goal, it is not about time — something else is blocking youTimestamps:00:00 - Welcome and episode overview: funding your business with your nine to five02:15 - Dani’s background and transition from corporate VP to coach04:00 - Building business resilience while maintaining a steady income06:45 - Creating effective exit strategies with targeted dates and reserves09:30 - The importance of understanding and managing your financial numbers11:55 - Strategies for balancing corporate responsibilities and business growth15:20 - The role of mindset work and emotional support in entrepreneurial success17:55 - How to use your current job to test and refine your business ideas20:30 - Cultivating confidence through data, experimentation, and small wins23:10 - The benefits of leveraging your skills, credibility, and connections26:45 - Overcoming fears and mindset blocks around visibility and sales29:20 - Practical tips for saving, investing, and funding your startup32:05 - Final encouragement to start small, stay consistent, and pursue your greatnessLearn more and stay connected:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

April 16, 2026Episode 12317 min

123. How to Get Promoted When Your Manager Is Not in Your Corner

My focus today is empowering the total baddie who knows she’s overqualified and is ready to level up, even if her manager isn’t supporting her. If you’re feeling unseen or unheard in your organization, this episode is your blueprint for building influence beyond one person’s support and creating your own success narrative with confidence and strategy.In this episode:Why working hard and doing great work doesn't automatically earn support for promotionThe power of building skip level relationships to amplify your visibility and influenceHow to showcase your results beyond your direct team to make your impact undeniableStrategies for owning your narrative and talking about your work with clarity and prideWhy you don’t need one supporter — you need a system of advocates inside the organizationReal-life success stories of clients who climbed out of unsupportive environmentsThe importance of creating a promotion plan with specific steps and key conversationsHow to leverage cross-functional relationships to fast-track your career goalsPractical tips for collecting receipts, sharing updates, and building your case for promotionTimestamps:00:00 - How to promote yourself when your manager isn't in your corner02:25 - Why your work alone isn't enough for promotion03:23 - The myth of advocates and sponsors—what really moves the needle05:14 - Building a skip level relationship as your secret weapon06:39 - Making your results visible across teams and leadership08:06 - Owning your narrative through executive updates and strategic talks09:55 - Collecting receipts and case studies to prove your impact10:22 - How to manage your story when your manager is unsupportive11:44 - The power of speaking about your work with confidence and pride13:10 - Success stories of clients who navigated non-supportive managers and moved up14:39 - Developing a strategic promotion plan rooted in action, not just thought15:59 - Balancing visibility as a first-generation Asian Latina in corporate America16:28 - Recognizing that your one supporter isn’t the only factor in your success17:23 - How to work with a coach to create your personalized promotion roadmapLearn more and stay connected:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

April 11, 2026Episode 12220 min

122. How to Land Your First Client Before You Even Have a Business

In episode 122, we're talking about how to land your first client before you even have a business.You have been noodling on this for a while. You know there is something there, a specific problem you know how to solve better than almost anyone in the room. And every time you think about actually starting, the list of things to build first gets longer. The website. The logo. The LLC. The brand. This episode is for the woman who is ready to stop getting ready.In this episode, I break down the three moves that take you from idea to paid, and the identity shift that happens the moment your first client says yes.In this episode, I cover:→ The productive procrastination trap and how to recognize when busy action is not the same as brave action→ Step 1: The one problem you already solve that makes you the go-to person in every room→ Step 2: Curiosity-based outreach that attracts clients instead of chasing them→ Step 3: Expert networks and communities that put you in front of the right people immediately→ Why landing your first client is about building from evidence, not hopeKey Takeaways:– You do not need a website, a logo, or an LLC to land your first client– Brave action is the conversation. Busy action is everything that delays it– Your signature problem is already showing up in the questions people always bring to you– Curiosity-based outreach is not pitching, it is positioning– The first client gives you evidence, and evidence is what builds the belief that sustains everything elseChapters:00:01 Introduction01:37 Today's Topic: Landing Your First Client Before You Have a Business04:32 Dani's Story: Doing Both for Two Years06:07 How to Land Your First Client06:48 Productive Procrastination09:52 Step 1: Write Down One Problem You Want to Solve12:11 Step 2: Curiosity-Based Outreach14:22 Step 3: Expert Networks and Community18:24 The Identity Shift of Landing Your First Client20:12 CTA and ClosingLearn more and stay connected:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

April 3, 2026Episode 12133 min

121. From Manager to Director in 4 Sessions: A Client Story with Lexy Williams

This one was too good to only share once. I'm bringing back one of my all-time favorite episodes for everyone who is new here in Season 3, and for everyone who needs to hear it again. Lexy's story is exactly what this podcast is about.In this fan favorite episode, I'm sitting down with my client Lexy Williams, who went from feeling completely stuck in a manager role to landing her dream director position in just four coaching sessions.Lexy is a first-generation professional, daughter of Sierra Leonean immigrants, and someone who came into coaching already knowing she was meant for more. She just needed the strategy, the clarity, and someone fully in her corner to help her get there. What happened next is exactly the kind of story I live for.We get into all of it, the mindset, the resume strategy, the non-negotiables, the two promotions, and the moment she sat down in her director's chair and knew she had arrived.In this episode, we cover:→ How Lexy advocated for herself to find a coach who was a woman of color before we even started→ What four coaching sessions actually looked like and how she maximized every moment in between→ The resume and cover letter strategy that started getting her callbacks almost immediately→ Why she pushed past a senior manager promotion to keep going for the director role she really wanted→ What it felt like to sit in the director's chair on day one and actually believe she belonged thereKey Takeaways:– You do not have to have it all figured out before you invest in yourself– The work between sessions matters just as much as the sessions themselves– Getting specific on your non-negotiables keeps you from settling for close enough– Coaching is not about fixing what is wrong, it is about building what is already there– Nobody puts Baby in the corner, and nobody should put you there eitherChapters:00:00 Introduction and Meet Lexy04:15 Why Lexy Decided to Invest in Coaching07:30 How She Found Dani and Advocated for a WOC Coach11:00 What the Coaching Goals Actually Were14:20 The Resume Strategy That Changed Everything18:45 Maximizing Coaching Between Sessions22:00 Two Promotions and Why She Kept Going26:30 The Director Role: What It Feels Like to Finally Be at the Table30:00 Why Lexy Recommends Coaching (The Dirty Dancing Analogy)32:00 ClosingLearn more and stay connected:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter