The Ownership Game with Gary Montalvo

Hosted by Gary Montalvo

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Aug 2025

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Welcome to The Ownership Game with Gary Montalvo, where weekly I bring you interviews, conversations, coaching, or insightful ramblings all with one purpose, to get you in the driver's seat of your life.

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August 5, 2025Episode 6657 min

Leadership Starts with You: Building a Legacy That Lasts – Christian Fischer

What if your greatest legacy isn’t what you leave behind — but how you live right now?In this episode of The Ownership Game, I sit down with Christian Fischer, a values-driven leader, entrepreneur, and father who’s on a mission to help people build legacies rooted in purpose, service, and self-awareness.This isn’t your typical leadership talk. Christian opens up about the habits, mindsets, and daily decisions that have shaped how he leads in business, in family, and in faith. From overcoming identity struggles to redefining success through service, this conversation is packed with wisdom that challenges the hustle-for-worth narrative — and invites you to slow down and lead with integrity.If you're an entrepreneur, parent, or high-performer who feels called to something deeper, this one’s for you. In this episode, we discuss:Why legacy starts long before you leave anything behindLeading from identity, not insecurityThe difference between calling and egoBuilding habits that reflect your values — not just your goalsLeading as a parent and partner with intentionalityHow to redefine masculinity through vulnerability and faithThe power of pausing to reflect, redirect, and realign Chapters:00:00 Welcome & Intro: Leadership Is Personal03:20 Meet Christian Fischer: Business, Family, and Faith06:45 From Confusion to Calling: Identity Work in Leadership10:10 Redefining Success: It's Not About Titles14:30 Legacy as a Daily Practice19:00 How Christian Leads at Home and in Business23:40 Habits, Anchors, and Rhythms That Build Character28:55 Masculinity, Faith & Leading Through Humility33:10 Learning to Slow Down to Speed Up38:40 What True Ownership Looks Like42:30 Christian’s Legacy Vision46:00 Final Reflections + Invitation to Lead from Within__________________________________ Connect with Christian:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christianjfischer/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DisruptiveChefCommunity LinkedIn: http://linkedin.com/in/christianjfischer Website: https://www.christianjfischer.com/ __________________________________ Love this episode? Here’s how to support the show:Subscribe & never miss an episode!Leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps more people discover the show!Share this episode with a friend who needs inspiration. __________________________________ Have a question or suggestion for the show? Let us know about it by visiting www.TheOwnershipGame.com Sign up to get episodes and bonus content delivered to your inbox weekly at www.TheOwnershipGame.com Watch the podcast on YouTube: https://bit.ly/47xYgUn

July 29, 202552 min

Ownership in the Age of AI: Leading Yourself Through the Revolution – Marnie Wills

What if the biggest risk in the Age of AI… is sitting on the sidelines? In this episode of The Ownership Game, host Gary Montalvo sits down with AI Strategist and educator Marnie Wills for an honest, insightful conversation on how to lead yourself (and your business) through the most disruptive technological revolution of our time. If AI feels intimidating, overwhelming, or like “something for the tech people,” this conversation is going to flip that script. Marnie, a self-proclaimed non-techie with an athlete’s mindset, shares how she became her own Chief AI Officer, and how she now helps everyday entrepreneurs and creatives do the same — without needing to code, know the jargon, or “keep up” with every new tool. This episode is all about mindset, experimentation, and reclaiming your agency in an accelerating world. Whether you're already using AI tools in your business or you’ve been avoiding it altogether, you'll walk away feeling clearer, more empowered, and ready to play the long game.   In this episode, we discuss: Why AI is not just about tech — it’s about how you think The real meaning of becoming your own Chief AI Officer How Marnie 10X’d her business using ChatGPT, Claude, and custom GPTs How to avoid the trap of “doing AI right” and just get started How AI can unlock confidence, creativity, and strategy What it means to protect your IP and brand in the age of AI Building your own branded AI tools + agents — and why it matters How to make AI your thinking partner and not just a copy machine    Chapters: 00:00 Welcome: The AI Revolution Is Already Here 03:00 Marnie’s Story: From Blackberry Loyalist to AI Strategist 06:45 How AI 10X’d Her Business (and Helped Her Exit One) 09:30 Developing an AI-First Mindset 13:00 Why You Don’t Need to Be “Techy” to Lead with AI 15:50 From Overwhelm to Ownership: Pick One Tool and Start 21:15 Becoming Your Own Chief AI Officer 26:00 Building Trust with AI Tools as a Creative/Entrepreneur 31:40 Using AI for Coaching, Strategy, and Business Ops 35:00 Launching Your Own AI Platform (and Owning Your Data) 40:30 How to Protect Your Intellectual Property 45:00 The Coaching Industry’s AI Disruption (And Opportunity) 49:00 Marnie’s Final Message: Confidence Through Collaboration __________________________________ Connect with Marnie: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/businesswithai_strategist/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/businesswithaistrategist  LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marnie-wills-entrepreneur  Website: www.businesswithaistrategist.com  Onesheet: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1uSdbDmSdjh5Sa_v5Htp-MbD2EIn_bxDH/view?usp=sharing  __________________________________ Love this episode? Here’s how to support the show: Subscribe & never miss an episode! Leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps more people discover the show! Share this episode with a friend who needs inspiration.    __________________________________ Have a question or suggestion for the show? Let us know about it by visiting www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Sign up to get episodes and bonus content delivered to your inbox weekly at www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Watch the podcast on YouTube: https://bit.ly/47xYgUn

July 22, 202554 min

Building a Life That Holds All of You with The Inspiration Engineer, Cauveé

What if success isn’t about doing more, but becoming more of who you already are? In this episode of The Ownership Game, Gary Montalvo sits down with Cauveé (Kaw-Vay), also known as Cauvee, and widely recognized as The Inspiration Engineer®, to talk about what it means to build a life that doesn’t just look good, but feels aligned on every level. Cauveé has helped influencers, entrepreneurs, and leaders take off the mask, reconnect with their truth, and create a reality that honors their full, authentic self. In this episode, he opens up about his own transformation, from living in survival mode to stepping into purpose-driven leadership. This conversation is raw, reflective, and filled with frameworks you can use to shift your energy, upgrade your environment, and finally start living a life that holds all of you.   In this episode, we discuss: The difference between living to survive vs. living to express What it takes to rewire your mindset after trauma and burnout How to stop building for the algorithm and start building for your soul Why presence > performance for entrepreneurs and creators Building a lifestyle that’s sustainable, soulful, and scalable Tuning into your own “divine algorithm”   Chapters:  00:00  Intro: The Inspiration Engineer Joins the Game 02:30  From Trauma to Transformation: Cauveé’s Origin Story 06:10  Why Achievement Can’t Heal Abandonment 09:50  Masculinity, Vulnerability & the Power of Softness 13:15  The Energy Audit: Realigning Your Time, People & Space 18:00  Authenticity vs. Performative Success in the Digital Age 23:40  Your Divine Algorithm: Operating From Inner Truth 29:20  The Cost of Living Disconnected from Purpose 33:50  Presence, Peace, and the Art of Letting Go 39:00  Designing a Life That Holds All of You 44:15  Cauveé’s Message to Creators and Leaders Ready to Evolve 47:30  Closing Reflections: Who Are You Without the Mask? __________________________________ Connect with Cauveé: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cauvee Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/cauvee LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cauvee Website:  inspirationengineer.com  Threads: https://www.threads.net/@cauvee Onesheet: https://docs.google.com/document/d/15QC1tuF2oRVynvwS1Zqb_ocvzndq-oHhewK2pmtJpto/edit?tab=t.0  __________________________________ Love this episode? Here’s how to support the show: Subscribe & never miss an episode! Leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps more people discover the show! Share this episode with a friend who needs inspiration.    __________________________________ Have a question or suggestion for the show? Let us know about it by visiting www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Sign up to get episodes and bonus content delivered to your inbox weekly at www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Watch the podcast on YouTube: https://bit.ly/47xYgUn  

July 15, 202549 min

When Success Becomes Your Cage: The Journey to Breaking Free from Expectations - Betsy Pepine

What if the life you built — the one that looks perfect on paper — feels like a prison behind the scenes? In this deeply honest conversation on The Ownership Game, Gary Montalvo sits down with Betsy Pepine, a successful real estate entrepreneur and author, who shares her story of what happens when outward success clashes with inner fulfillment. Betsy opens up about the moment she realized she was living inside “boxes” built by other people’s expectations — and the courageous journey she took to break free, rewrite her story, and define success on her own terms. If you’ve ever found yourself chasing achievement but feeling empty, questioning the stories you’ve inherited, or wondering how to live a more authentic life — this episode of The Ownership Game is for you.   In this episode, we discuss: The hidden cost of the hustle culture How “boxes” keep us stuck in invisible cages The fear of letting go of status, identity, or financial security Practices for tuning in, asking better questions, and creating real freedom How to redefine your relationship with success and failure Why unlearning old programming is the key to authentic leadership   Chapters:  00:00 Introduction: When the Hustle Becomes the Cage 02:30 Meet Betsy Pepine: Success on Paper, Disconnection Inside 06:00 The First Signs: Listening to the Body and Inner Voice 09:30 Tools for Uncovering the Truth: Therapy, Meditation & More 14:45 Defining and Spotting the “Boxes” You Live In 19:20 Social and Cultural Boxes: Gender, Money & Status 25:00 The Ego Death of Changing Careers and Identities 31:30 Framework: Identifying Your Boxes and Facing the Fears 36:50 Betsy’s Book and How It Can Help Others 40:10 Powerful Takeaways: Joy, Impact, and Authenticity 46:30 Closing Reflections: Remembering Who You Really Are __________________________________ Connect with Betsy: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/betsypepine/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/betsypepine LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/betsypepine/ Website: https://www.betsypepine.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@BetsyPepine  Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@gainesvillerealtor    Grab Betsy’s book Breaking Free from the Boxes: https://www.amazon.com/Breaking-Boxes-Dismantling-Metaphorical-That/dp/1636802842/ref=tmm_hrd_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=  Join Betsy’s new companion course coming soon! __________________________________   Love this episode? Here’s how to support the show: Subscribe & never miss an episode! Leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps more people discover the show! Share this episode with a friend who needs inspiration.    __________________________________   Have a question or suggestion for the show? Let us know about it by visiting www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Sign up to get episodes and bonus content delivered to your inbox weekly at www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Watch the podcast on YouTube: https://bit.ly/47xYgUn

July 8, 202557 min

Breaking the Cycle of Self-Sabotage – Sara Gilbert

Why do we get stuck in self-sabotaging patterns — even when we know exactly what to do?  In this powerful episode of The Ownership Game, Gary sits down with mindset and strategy coach Sara Gilbert to unpack the invisible patterns that keep entrepreneurs, leaders, and high-achievers stuck in the cycle of “I know what to do, but I’m not doing it.” Sara reveals how our identity, emotions, and the stories we tell ourselves create hidden limits on our growth. Together, they break down how to spot these patterns, rewire your language, and shift from fear-driven action to leadership-driven alignment. If you’ve ever felt trapped by procrastination, perfectionism, or over-preparation — this episode will show you how to break free.   In this episode, we discuss:   Identity anchors behavior. What you say after “I am” shapes what you’ll do — or avoid. Safety drives sabotage. Often we don’t procrastinate out of laziness, but to protect a version of ourselves we’ve learned to keep safe. Language is power. The stories you repeat become your reality. Awareness and new questions are the key to change. Slowing down speeds you up. Reflection and intentional language create sustainable, aligned action. Chapters:  00:00 The Power of “I Am” Statements: How Identity Shapes Behavior 02:30 Sara’s Journey: From Business Strategy to Deep Mindset Work 05:50 Why “Be-Do-Have” is the Real Game Changer for Entrepreneurs 08:00 The Hidden Role of Emotions: Why Safety Sabotages Growth 14:00 The Familiarity Zone: Why We Stay in Patterns that Don’t Serve Us 19:00 Language as a Tool: How to Rewrite Your Stories 25:00 The Right Questions vs. The Wrong Questions: Moving from Stuck to Free 33:00 Why Slowing Down Helps You Speed Up 42:00 Self-Awareness, Self-Honesty, Self-Leadership: A New Model for Change 51:00 Why Ownership Over Your Stories is Non-Negotiable 54:00 Final Thoughts: Playing the Ownership Game in Life and Business __________________________________   Connect with Sara: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/saragilbertstrategist/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100015061414304 Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/saragilbert/ Website: https://saragilbert.coach/  __________________________________   Love this episode? Here’s how to support the show: Subscribe & never miss an episode! Leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps more people discover the show! Share this episode with a friend who needs inspiration.    __________________________________   Have a question or suggestion for the show? Let us know about it by visiting www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Sign up to get episodes and bonus content delivered to your inbox weekly at www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Watch the podcast on YouTube: https://bit.ly/47xYgUn

July 1, 202552 min

It’s Not a Calendar Problem, It’s a You Problem - Dr. Jaime G. Raygoza

Is burnout just a scheduling issue — or is it the story you’re telling yourself? In this powerful episode of The Ownership Game, Gary Montalvo sits down with Dr. Jaime G. Raygoza, organizational psychologist, coach, and burnout expert, to dismantle the myth that overwork is just about poor time management. Dr. Jaime shares his raw, near-fatal story of hustle culture gone too far — and the hard-earned wisdom he now uses to help entrepreneurs, leaders, and high-achievers break the cycle of burnout. If you’ve ever felt like the only way to succeed is to do more, push harder, or ignore what your body is screaming at you — this conversation is your permission slip to choose a wiser path.   In this episode, we discuss: Why your hustle might be rooted in trauma or an old identity story The hidden physical symptoms your body uses to warn you about burnout How stress kills creativity and long-term business growth Simple, science-backed daily rituals to reset your nervous system (hello, laughter yoga!) How to plan for success as an entrepreneur in the infinite game   Chapters:  00:00  Introduction: The Infinite vs. Finite Game 03:00  Meet Dr. Jaime: From 120-Hour Weeks to Near Death 10:00  What Drives Unchecked Hustle? Proving Your Worth 18:00  Signs You’re Burnt Out (Your Body Knows First) 24:00  Why Entrepreneurs Ignore Burnout (and Pay the Price) 31:00  How Burnout Limits Innovation & Leadership 36:00  Practical Reset Tools: Body Scans, Environment Shifts & Laughter Yoga 44:00  How to Manage Stress When You Can’t Change Your Circumstances 48:00  The Gift Inside the Breakdown: Enjoying the Process 52:00  Outro: Stop Proving, Start Living __________________________________ Connect with Dr. Jaime: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rainbowcareercoaching  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100089604794211  Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jaime-gabriel-raygoza/  Website: http://www.rainbowcareercoaching.com/  __________________________________ Love this episode? Here’s how to support the show: Subscribe & never miss an episode! Leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps more people discover the show! Share this episode with a friend who needs inspiration.    __________________________________ Have a question or suggestion for the show? Let us know about it by visiting www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Sign up to get episodes and bonus content delivered to your inbox weekly at www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Watch the podcast on YouTube: https://bit.ly/47xYgUn

June 24, 202554 min

Resilience and Hope: The Story Behind a Globally Ranked Podcast - Lesley-Anne Stone

What does it look like to say yes to your inner nudge—even when it's terrifying? In this episode of The Ownership Game, Gary sits down with longtime friend and powerhouse marketing executive turned podcast host, Lesley-Anne Stone. After facing the life-altering challenge of parenting a child with severe food allergies, Lesley-Anne launched the globally ranked podcast Resilience and Hope, giving voice to the raw, emotional, and empowering stories that often go untold in the parenting and health world. She opens up about how grief, intuition, and a deep need for authenticity fueled her unexpected leap into podcasting—and how that leap has impacted families around the world. Whether you’ve got an idea on the backburner or you’re in the thick of building something new, this episode is a masterclass in trusting your instincts, creating with purpose, and leading with your story.   In this episode, we discuss: How to transform personal pain into powerful purpose What it takes to launch a globally ranked podcast The role of intuition in making bold creative moves Why authenticity is the currency of connection How to overcome fear and take the first step What parents of food allergy kids need to hear most   Chapters:  0:00 A Mother’s Mission Begins 2:00 Saying Yes to the Inner Nudge 6:30 From Branding Executive to Podcast Host 11:45 How a Doctor’s Invitation Sparked It All 14:00 The Power of Moving Before You’re Ready 17:30 Grief, Growth, and the Gift of Collaboration 22:00 Building a Podcast That’s Deeply Personal 27:00 The Risk and Reward of Radical Honesty 33:00 Inside the Groundbreaking Food Allergy Program 38:00 What It Really Takes to Get to Remission 44:00 Making Hope Accessible to Families Everywhere 48:00 Season Two, Possibility, and the Next Chapter __________________________________ Connect with Lesley-Anne: Instagram: @resilienceandhopepodcast Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesleyannestone/ Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@resilienceandhopepodcast Website: https://linktr.ee/resilienceandhopepodcast  Food Allergy Institute: www.foodallergyinstitute.com Resilience And Hope: A Food Allergy Podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify and YouTube. Links below! Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/resilience-hope-a-food-allergy-podcast/id1797657949  Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3uQ1UHk9k0oBaJpKE310YT  Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@ResilienceandHopePodcast/shorts  __________________________________ Love this episode? Here’s how to support the show: Subscribe & never miss an episode! Leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps more people discover the show! Share this episode with a friend who needs inspiration.    __________________________________ Have a question or suggestion for the show? Let us know about it by visiting www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Sign up to get episodes and bonus content delivered to your inbox weekly at www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Watch the podcast on YouTube: https://bit.ly/47xYgUn

June 17, 202557 min

Forged by Pressure: Ron Rubin on Character, Discipline, and Quiet Leadership

What happens when life doesn't hand you safety—but you choose strength instead? In this powerful episode of The Ownership Game, Gary sits down with Ron Rubin, a successful entrepreneur and financial advisor whose character was literally forged by pressure. From facing antisemitism and domestic abuse in his youth to building a thriving business grounded in integrity, Ron shares how adversity shaped his relentless discipline, his unshakable values, and his quiet—but potent—leadership style. This isn’t a story about surviving the past. It’s a masterclass in transforming it. Whether you’re an entrepreneur, a leader, or someone looking to rebuild from the inside out—this is the episode you didn’t know you needed.   In this episode, we discuss: How childhood adversity created the conditions for Ron’s inner grit The powerful mindset behind turning trauma into fuel for success Why your habits determine your destiny more than your circumstances A rare look at character-driven leadership in financial services The three things Ron writes down every day to keep him focused What it looks like to lead with integrity—even when it costs you   Chapters: 00:00 Life on High Alert: Ron’s early years facing violence at home and school 03:30 Turning Pain into Purpose: The mindset shift that defined his life 07:40 Education as a Lifeline: The immigrant work ethic and academic ambition 13:00 Resilience, Not Reaction: When bullying teaches self-worth 19:00 Witnessing a Parent’s Downfall: The impact of addiction on identity 25:00 Forging a Career: The bold early years of Ron’s financial services journey 27:15 Lessons from 120 Mentors: What top performers all have in common 30:00 Radical Transparency in Business: Defining values in a shady industry 34:30 Taking Ownership in Crisis: A major betrayal and how Ron handled it 39:50 Fortune Favors the Bold: Risking it all to start his own firm 42:00 Legacy and Mentorship: Serving future generations with integrity 50:00 The Exit Plan: Why Ron sold his company—and what comes next 53:00 Daily Discipline: Ron’s personal system for staying aligned 56:00 Final Takeaway: You’re not what you survived—you’re who you become __________________________________   Love this episode? Here’s how to support the show: Subscribe & never miss an episode! Leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps more people discover the show! Share this episode with a friend who needs inspiration.    __________________________________   Have a question or suggestion for the show? Let us know about it by visiting www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Sign up to get episodes and bonus content delivered to your inbox weekly at www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Watch the podcast on YouTube: https://bit.ly/47xYgUn

June 10, 202557 min

Judgment: The Silent Killer of Self-Worth - Dawn Speaks

Judgment is sneaky—it wears the disguise of perfectionism, people-pleasing, and hustle. And the most dangerous part? We often don’t even realize it’s there.  In this episode of The Ownership Game, Gary Montalvo is joined by transformational coach and leadership expert Dawn Speaks to explore how judgment silently corrodes self-worth, derails potential, and keeps us from showing up fully in our lives. Together, they unpack how inherited beliefs, cultural conditioning, and internalized voices from the past shape our behavior and identity. You'll learn how judgment isn't just a thought—it’s an operating system. But the good news? It can be dismantled. If you've ever performed strength while struggling, avoided action because you feared being “too much,” or secretly believed success needs to be earned through suffering—this conversation is your invitation to break free.   In this episode, we discuss: Judgment is identity-shaping. Most of our limiting beliefs stem from old stories that we've never stopped to question. High performers aren’t immune. Accomplishment doesn’t mean you’ve outrun judgment—it often means it’s gotten sneakier. Inherited beliefs aren’t yours. Much of what we think is “just who I am” is actually borrowed from family, culture, or trauma. Working hard ≠ worthiness. Hustle can be a trauma response in disguise. Transformation starts with awareness. You can’t dismantle what you don’t see.   Chapters: 00:00 Opening Reflections: The voice in your head isn't your own 03:20 Introducing Dawn Speaks: A powerful voice in leadership and transformation 08:00 Coaching Entrepreneurs: Fear, capacity, and breaking internal ceilings 13:30 The Real Voice of Judgment: Would you let someone else talk to you that way? 18:40 The Hustle Trap: How “working hard” can be a mask for unworthiness 24:00 Presence vs. Productivity: Why slowing down can move you forward 27:30 Money Shame & Inherited Stories: Judgment’s grip on our financial identity 33:00 Discovery vs. Defensiveness: Fighting for your limitations 38:00 Boundaries, Bravery & Saying “No”: Empowerment without apology 46:00 Invitation to the Event: Beyond Circumstances—July 26th in NYC 55:00 Final Thoughts: Bringing discernment with compassion __________________________________   Connect with Dawn: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dspeaksleo/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/dawn.speaks.77 Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dawnspeaks/ Please Note: Beyond Circumstances: Dawn and Gary's one-day training in NYC has been rescheduled to October 11th. https://beyondcircumstancesnyc.com/   __________________________________   Love this episode? Here’s how to support the show: Subscribe & never miss an episode! Leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps more people discover the show! Share this episode with a friend who needs inspiration.    __________________________________   Have a question or suggestion for the show? Let us know about it by visiting www.TheOwnershipGame.com Sign up to get episodes and bonus content delivered to your inbox weekly at www.TheOwnershipGame.com Watch the podcast on YouTube: https://bit.ly/47xYgUn

June 3, 20251 hr 2 min

Escaping a High-Control Religious System: Michelle Moffitt on Healing, Power & Voice

 What happens when a smart, capable woman gets trapped in a high-control religious system that strips her of her identity, voice, and power? In this powerful episode of The Ownership Game, host Gary Montalvo sits down with psychotherapist, leadership coach, and author Michelle Moffitt. For 30 years, Michelle was immersed in a patriarchal religious system that shaped every part of her life—from her marriage to her career to her voice. But this is more than a story about faith or religion—it’s about trauma, belonging, people-pleasing, and the cost of abandoning your authenticity for acceptance. Michelle’s story is raw, honest, and a wake-up call for anyone questioning the systems they're a part of. If you've ever felt stuck in a life you didn't consciously choose—or found yourself judging someone who is—this conversation will challenge and inspire you.    In this episode, we discuss: How trauma and the need for safety can lead us into high-control systems—even when we come from empowered backgrounds The subtle, progressive tactics of control: love-bombing, isolation, gaslighting, and indoctrination The psychological toll of spiritual and emotional abuse—and how it erodes self-trust Why smart, intuitive, high-functioning people often stay in toxic systems far longer than they think they will The power of the Enneagram, therapy, and coaching in rebuilding identity and voice after leaving a controlling environment What it means to forgive yourself, reclaim your life, and move forward without judgment Chapters: 00:00 Intro Clip: Michelle on Gaslighting in Religious Systems 01:16 Welcome to The Ownership Game 02:10 What Are High-Control Systems & Why Smart People Get Trapped 03:30 Introducing Michelle Moffitt: Therapist, Coach, Author 04:00 Michelle’s Progressive Upbringing vs. The System She Entered 06:00 Trauma, Date Rape & the Search for Safety 08:00 Entering a Patriarchal Religious System 10:00 Early Red Flags, Marriage, and Loss of Voice 13:00 Why We Stay: Belonging, Love-Bombing & Indoctrination 16:00 Understanding Narcissism, Gaslighting & Control 20:00 The Turning Point: Realizing Something Was Deeply Wrong 23:00 Asking for Help from the Church—and Being Told to Repent 27:00 Being Cast Out, Losing Everything & Moving Back to Seattle 31:00 Rebuilding Life From Scratch 34:00 Healing the Body from Hypervigilance 36:00 Becoming a Therapist: Awakening Through Education 39:00 Enneagram, Coaching, and Newfound Agency 45:00 Final Reflections on Motivation, Forgiveness & Self-Compassion 54:00 Advice for Others Escaping Toxic Systems 58:00 Closing Thoughts from Gary: Healing Begins with Honoring Your Truth  __________________________________ Connect with Michelle: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/michellemoffittcoach/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/michelle.rogers.520357/https://www.facebook.com/michelle.rogers.520357/ Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michellemoffittcoach/  Website: https://michellemoffitt.com/  Michelle would like to promote: https://www.amazon.com/Cracked-Open-Journey-Resilient-Independent-ebook/dp/B0DCCFCT5D/ref=sr_1_1?crid=23VQZJN1V6JKI&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.PYMyl6cA-9ODB4h2mORSfd8EhDwCJkHGACcGpF5ZclQ-vzl95zWIMuZx1hKAYAKFMHfK-IgdR0ZXAawSD0TZ1g.Nn3Ig2eHPMANvfOBDJEX_-u1u-j6IefuFeCYLDWvwsE&dib_tag=se&keywords=michelle+moffitt+cracked&qid=1736628528&sprefix=%2Caps%2C141&sr=8-1    __________________________________ Love this episode? Here’s how to support the show: Subscribe & never miss an episode! Leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps more people discover the show! Share this episode with a friend who needs inspiration.    __________________________________ Have a question or suggestion for the show? Let us know about it by visiting www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Sign up to get episodes and bonus content delivered to your inbox weekly at www.TheOwnershipGame.com   Watch the podcast on YouTube: https://bit.ly/47xYgUn