The Connected Leadership Podcast

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266

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Oct 2026

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Speaker and author on professional relationships, Andy Lopata, explores great connections with experts and high achievers worldwide.

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November 9, 2026Episode 35821 min

How to Defuse Conflict and Stop Talking on Eggshells with Sam Horn

Did you know that 67% of professionals identify as conflict-averse? When workplace tension strikes, our default reaction is usually to run for the hills or start pointing fingers. In this dynamic archive extract of The Connected Leadership Bytes , Andy Lopata sits down with legendary communications strategist Sam Horn, author of Talking on Eggshells and creator of Tongue Fu! . Sam explains why ignoring conflict guarantees it will fester, and reveals how to replace reactive "fight, flight, or freeze" impulses with a graceful, proactive flow. Drawing on brilliant real-world case studies, Sam unpacks how language can either inflame an argument or unlock psychological safety. Discover the physical "pattern interrupt" that stops boardroom finger-pointing in its tracks, why denying an accusation only escalates it, and the precise four- and six-word phrases that convert defensiveness into empathy. Whether you’re managing tense client negotiations or navigating internal team drama, this bite-sized masterclass will teach you how to fight fire with water, shape behaviour without shaming it, and fix the course for the future instead of fixing blame for the past. What You will Learn In This Episode The 6-Word Career Saver: What specific six words saved an employee from being fired and turned a misunderstanding into an immediate promotion? The Accusation Trap: Why denying an unfair attack ( "We do care about our customers!" ) instantly backfires, and the 4-word question you should ask instead. The Boardroom "Time Out": How a physical hand gesture borrowed from sports can halt meeting finger-pointing and stop blame games cold. Flow Over Friction: Why 67% of people run from conflict, and how adopting "verbal martial arts" allows you to fight fire with water. Actionable Insights Use the "Let's Not Do This" Pattern Interrupt: When a team meeting degenerates into finger-pointing, don't try to out-shout the room. Make a physical "T" sign with your hands for a visual pause, and say: "Let’s not do this. It won't help." Follow John F. Kennedy’s advice: shift the room’s energy from fixing the blame for the past to fixing the course for the future. Respond with "What Do You Mean?": When someone hits you with a sweeping, emotional accusation, resist the urge to get defensive. Asking "What do you mean?" defuses the attack, de-escalates hostility, and forces them to share the concrete, underlying issue that actually needs addressing. Ask "Could You Please Help Me Understand?": When facing a sudden conflict, bad news, or a harsh critique, avoid tears, anger, or silent withdrawal. Use these six disarming words to transform a high-friction confrontation into an open, honest dialogue. SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube Connect with Sam Horn: Website | LinkedIn | The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring

November 2, 2026Episode 35745 min

How Leaders Can Truly Listen with Megan Reitz

Why is it so difficult to connect at a deep, authentic level inside modern organisations? In this episode , host Andy Lopata sits down with Thinkers50 leader Megan Reitz to explore the hidden dynamics of workplace dialogue. Drawing on the philosophy of Martin Buber, Megan breaks down the difference between "being and seeming" at work and explains why traditional corporate efforts to encourage employees to speak up fail if leaders aren't actively listening. They discuss what prevents managers from seeing their own blind spots and how to react to uncomfortable feedback. Megan Reitz is a world ranked leading management thinker. She is a renowned executive coach, researcher and author specialising in how humans speak, listen, connect and navigate power dynamics at work. What We Discussed in This Episode: From Strategy to Human Behaviour: Complex human behaviour in groups The Power Distance Gap: The influence of social and family background The Superiority Illusion: Red Flags for Leaders: Why people are afraid to speak truth to power Connect with Andy and the Guest Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube Connect with Megan Reitz: Website | LinkedIn | Connect with Andy Woodfield: Website The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring

October 26, 2026Episode 35619 min

Why Personality Tests Are Failing Your Culture with Eksteen De Waal

Are you putting your team members into color-coded boxes and wondering why interpersonal conflict still erupts? In this thought-provoking archive episode of The Connected Leadership Bytes , Andy Lopata sits down with executive coach and "Team Architect" Eksteen de Waal. Eksteen challenges the corporate obsession with traditional Myers-Briggs and behaviorist profiles, arguing that reducing human beings to a four-letter acronym strips away their nuance and does nothing to solve real organisational friction. Comparing leadership teams to complex buildings—requiring everything from minor behavioral renovations to total structural teardowns—Eksteen explains how individual coping mechanisms and unspoken triggers accidentally calcify into toxic workplace systems. He introduces the neurological reality of "Super Seers," the danger of viewing people through the lens of their worst moments, and how a devastating childhood tragedy in apartheid-era South Africa sparked his lifelong obsession with understanding why good people behave badly. If you want to move beyond superficial HR tick-box exercises and learn how to genuinely diagnose the structural cracks in your leadership team, this conversation is an absolute must-listen. What you will learn in this episode The Four-Letter Acronym Trap: Why relying on generic personality types blinds leaders to the real relationship systems driving team behaviour. The "Super Seers": Discover the genetically gifted individuals who act as your company’s emotional glue—and why you must listen when they speak. Behavior vs. Identity: Why the actions you observe in the boardroom are rarely who a person truly is, but merely an expression of what the environment permits. Bricks vs. Mortar: The architectural metaphor that separates individual talent from the relational glue that holds high-performing teams together. The Invisible "Outsider" Tax: How subtle micro-signals create an entirely different, exhausting workplace reality for underrepresented team members. Actionable Insights Treat Assessments as Hypotheses, Not Truths: Never use profiling tools to pigeonhole employees into rigid categories. Use assessments solely as conversation starters to explore how differences can be leveraged constructively, rather than as a crutch to avoid difficult interpersonal conversations. Locate Your Team's "Emotional Nodes": Identify the natural "Super Seers" in your business—colleagues with high cognitive empathy who instinctively sense unspoken tension. Use them as an early-warning radar for cultural friction and burnout. Distinguish the Person from the Coping Mechanism: When an executive or colleague behaves defensively, stop labeling them as "difficult." Recognise that bad behavior is often an automated defense mechanism triggered by stress or a perceived lack of psychological safety. Address the environmental trigger, not just the symptom. SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube Connect with Eksteen de Waal: Website | LinkedIn | The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring Episode 192 Featuring Eksteen de Vaal.

October 19, 2026Episode 35521 min

Sweet Challenges With Zaza Pachulia

How does an athlete from the small nation of Georgia beat astronomical odds to play 16 seasons in the NBA, win two World Championships, and compete in over 1,000 games? In this archive episode of Connected Leadership Bytes , Andy Lopata sits down with former Golden State Warriors centre and current executive Zaza Pachulia. Zaza dismantles the romantic myth of effortless talent. Admitting he was never the fastest runner or the highest jumper, he explains why raw athleticism burns out quickly without an obsessive work ethic and an appetite for sacrifice. From facing Shaquille O'Neal as a 19-year-old rookie and immediately adding 40 pounds of muscle to survive in the paint, to the emotional challenge of setting strict boundaries with lifelong friends, Zaza reveals the mental fortitude required to outlast the competition. Discover why asking for help is a superpower of elite performers, how to win over senior mentors, and why treating your daily habits "like a clock" is the ultimate secret to career longevity. What You Will Learn In This Episode The Top 450 Mindset: What it takes mentally and physically to earn—and keep—one of only 450 roster spots in the world for nearly two decades. The Shaquille O’Neal Reality Check: How an embarrassing physical mismatch against an NBA legend at age 19 led to a transformative 7:00 AM training commitment. The Discipline of "No": Why reaching the pinnacle of your career requires saying no to social outings, travel, and cultural expectations—and how to handle the friction it creates with loved ones. How to Unlock Veteran Mentors: The specific, daily habit questions rookies must ask senior colleagues to turn them into invested, lifelong advocates. The Draft Day Trap: Why young talent often fails by believing they were hired for what they already know, rather than their potential to grow. Actionable Insights Confront Your Physical & Strategic Gaps: Do not rely solely on the strengths that got you hired. When you encounter high-level competition, honestly assess where you fall short. Engage Mentors by Inquiring About Their Process: To build relationships with senior leaders, stop asking generic career advice. Ask about their daily mechanics: "How do you structure your morning? How do you maintain energy across long projects? What are you reading?" Showing genuine curiosity about their process makes veterans eager to take you under their wing. Run Your Workday "Like a Clock": When operating in high-stress, high-performance environments, eliminate decision fatigue through routine. Protect your rest, schedule your preparation, and set firm boundaries around non-essential distractions. Balance this discipline with intentional, scheduled "off-season" periods where you completely disconnect and recharge. SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube Connect with Zaza Pachulia: LinkedIn | The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring Episode 191 Featuring Zaza

October 12, 2026Episode 35421 min

The Art of Caring Deeply with Emmy-Nominated Director Annetta Marion

What does it take to direct cultural icons like Oprah Winfrey and produce ground-breaking films like Still: A Michael J. Fox Movie ? In this inspiring archive episode of The Connected Leadership Bytes , Andy Lopata sits down with primetime Emmy-nominated director and producer Annetta Marion. Annetta shares her radical career leap—walking away from a secure corporate engineering career and a company-sponsored master's degree to start at the absolute bottom as an unpaid film intern. Drawing from six seasons on the hit docuseries Oprah's Master Class , Annetta unpacks the psychology of high-stakes storytelling and creative leadership. She explains why the best directors and executives aren't dictators on set, but empathetic facilitators whose first job is to "care deeply" and diagnose what each team member needs to succeed. From non-linear narrative techniques that keep audiences gripped to building an authentic, non-transactional network among Hollywood's elite, this episode is a masterclass in emotional intelligence, creative agility, and human connection. What You will Learn The Engineering Leap: Why walking away from a corporate engineering career to start over as an unpaid intern was the best decision Annetta ever made. The Science of Storytelling: Why human psychology is hardwired to retain narrative far more effectively than data, slides, or rote memorization. The Anti-Dictator Leadership Style: Why great directors don't bark orders, but instead adapt to whether a team member needs space, silence, or 19 hours of conversation. The "Care Deeply" Principle: Why high-profile talent and executive peers can instantly sniff out insincerity if you don't genuinely care about the mission. The Anti-Transactional Network: Why entering a room with an "Excel hit list" destroys rapport, and why the secret to networking in Hollywood is simply trying to make friends. Actionable Insights Meet People Where They Are (The "Day 11" Rule): Recognize that even the most reliable colleagues or clients have external lives that impact their state of mind. Don't expect uniform behavior every day; take a moment to assess where someone is emotionally in that exact moment and adapt your communication accordingly. Communicate Through Narrative Over Data: If you have critical information that a team or client must remember, wrap it in a story. Focus on human motives, challenges, and pivots rather than isolated metrics. Stories connect "soul to soul" and dramatically improve retention. Ditch the Transactional Agenda: When building relationships with high-status peers or senior leaders, drop the hidden angles. Approach every conversation with the simple goal of befriending the person and finding common ground. Genuine community-building always outperforms strategic networking checklists. SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube Connect with Annetta Marion: Website | LinkedIn | The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring Episode 191 Featuring Annetta Marion

October 5, 2026Episode 35343 min

The Surprising Science of "Decision Intelligence" With Simon Hill

Is your organisation actually innovating, or are you just participating in "innovation theater"? In this deeply analytical episode, Andy Lopata sits down with Simon Hill, CEO of Wazoku, to explore how leaders can close the gap between looking innovative and actually delivering measurable, future-proof value. Simon challenges the common wisdom of separating innovation from the core of the business, arguing instead that true transformation must happen from the inside out. Drawing fascinating parallels from sports analytics—specifically how Premier League clubs like Brentford balance massive data teams with old-school character scouting— Andy and Simon debate the tension between quantitative data and human intuition. Simon introduces his patent-pending algorithmic approach to "quantifying the qualitative," explaining how leaders can map their "problem landscapes" using synthetic data. Finally, they dive into the revolutionary concept of "Kill Credits," showing how organisations can turn failed, $10 million projects into tangible balance sheet assets that drive future success. About Our Guest: Simon Hill is the founder and CEO of Wazoku, a leading collective intelligence and innovation platform that works with global organizations including NASA, HSBC, and Shell. Simon is the author of Expected Value , a regular contributor to Forbes , and an Entrepreneur in Residence at the prestigious business school INSEAD. Under his leadership, Wazoku has run some of the most complex, large-scale innovation programs globally, focusing on turning innovation from a corporate slogan into a measurable science. What We Discussed In This Episode Innovation Theater vs. Performance: Why cultural gestures, mindsets, and learning are only valuable if they ultimately result in the creation of new and novel value for the future. The Sports Analytics Debate: A look at Premier League football clubs (like Brentford and Brighton) employing up to 100 data analysts, contrasted with traditional, relationship-driven managers who scout a player’s character by visiting their homes. Desirable, Feasible, Viable: Why the "best on paper" solution is rarely the one chosen, and how leaders can codify their unique organizational "special sauce" (culture, risk appetite, and leadership style) as a core dataset. The "Kill Credit" Concept: A revolutionary accounting mechanism that takes the expected value of a failed, terminated project and applies it as a temporary (12-month) balance sheet asset representing documented organizational learning. Bridging Strategy, Innovation, and Finance: Why the typical corporate disconnect between future-mapping (strategy), value-building (innovation), and funding (finance) is so damaging, and how a shared metric can align them. AI vs. HI (Human Interaction): Why artificial intelligence is not actually intelligent, but rather a tool designed to enhance human decision intelligence and drive more meaningful collaboration. Resources Mentioned in this Episode: Simon Hill’s Book: Expected Value: How to Quant the Qual and Avoid Innovation Theater Alvin Turner’s Work: The concept of "Zombie Projects" Download the full episode to learn how to turn your qualitative ideas into quantitative business value! Connect with Andy & Simon Hill Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube Connect with Simon Hill: Website | LinkedIn | The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring

September 28, 2026Episode 35220 min

The Human Truth About Sales Relationships With John Maguire

Most salespeople shudder at the mention of CRM software. Why? Because too many platforms are implemented as administrative surveillance rather than tools that empower human connection. In this practical archive episode of Connected Leadership Bytes , Andy Lopata sits down with John Maguire, Regional VP of Sales at SugarCRM. John demystifies the real purpose of Customer Relationship Management, comparing great technology to a local butcher who greets you by name, anticipates your order, and spots when something is amiss. Addressing the staggering 37% global customer churn rate, John explores why disjointed systems alienate once-loyal buyers and how leaders can drive genuine software adoption by embedding data capture into the natural "flow of work." From the critical distinction between fear of missing out (FOMO) and the "fear of messing up" (FOMU) to the principles of ethical selling, John explains how technology should support human intimacy rather than automate it away. What You will Learn From This Episode The Butcher Shop Test: What a small local business can teach multi-million-pound enterprises about customer intimacy and CRM value. The 37% Churn Leak: Why failing to connect customer service platforms with sales data leads to invisible customer losses. The "Single Truth" Mandate: Why senior leadership must live and breathe the rule that "there is only one truth, and that is in the CRM." FOMO vs. Fear of Messing Up: What recent sales research reveals about why buyers freeze, and why human rapport is the only antidote. Actionable Insights Integrate Data into the "Flow of Work": Stop forcing your team to do manual admin at the end of the day. Equip them with mobile tools, card scanners, and automatic logging so capturing meeting notes is seamless. Show sales reps the direct personal value of the data (such as automated daily priority lists) rather than framing it as executive oversight. Anchor Urgency to the Client’s Timeline: Never push artificial sales deadlines based on internal quotas. Ask deep, empathetic questions to tease out the client’s real timeline (e.g., contract end-of-life dates, system launches) and work backward to create a shared implementation schedule that serves their business outcomes. Start the Relationship After the Signature: Shift your organisational mindset so that contract signing is the beginning of the relationship, not the finish line. Schedule regular, value-driven check-ins throughout multi-year contracts so renewals and referrals happen naturally as a matter of course. Connect with Andy Lopata John Maguire Sugar CRM

September 21, 2026Episode 35121 min

Creativity, Chemistry & Collaboration with an Emmy-Winning Comedy Writer Beth Sherman

Ever wondered what it takes to write comedy for Hollywood’s biggest stars five nights a week? In this lively archive episode of Connected Leadership Bytes , Andy Lopata sits down with seven-time Emmy Award-winning comedy writer and stand-up comedian Beth Sherman ( The Tonight Show with Jay Leno , Ellen , The Late Show with David Letterman , The Oscars ). Beth pulls back the curtain on late-night television's relentless creative engine, where writers churn out 70 to 100 jokes every single morning just to produce a single 20-joke monologue. She reveals the art of writing authentically in someone else’s voice—explaining how the exact same comedic premise must be tailored to fit the distinct speech patterns and personas of different performers. Beyond comedy, Beth shares profound leadership lessons on creative collaboration under tight deadlines, the professional boundaries needed when working directly with celebrity "CEOs," and why the best writers' rooms deliberately recruit opposing political voices to challenge their own echo chambers. What You Will Learn In This Episode The 100-Joke Daily Grind: Why top monologue writers must produce up to 100 jokes a day just to get two minutes of airtime—and what that teaches us about creative volume. The Voice-Mimic Technique: How skilled writers take one single idea and adapt its tone, cadence, and style to fit completely different personalities. The "Boss" Boundary: Why working closely with top-tier talent requires mutual professional respect and deference, rather than trying to become their best friend. The "Half-Baked" Brainstorm: How elite writers' rooms use unfinished, imperfect ideas as springboards for collaborative breakthroughs. The Echo Chamber Antidote: Why top comedy shows intentionally hire writers across the political spectrum to play devil's advocate and uncover the truth. Actionable Insights Adopt the "Half-Baked Idea" Mindset in Brainstorming: In team ideation sessions, remove the pressure for everyone to pitch fully formed, perfect solutions. Encourage people to throw raw, half-baked concepts into the room so colleagues can catch, build upon, and refine them into winning ideas. Master the "Ear" for Other People's Voices: When communicating on behalf of an executive, client, or brand, study their existing body of work. Pay attention to their speech rhythm, vocabulary, and core values so you can adapt your core message into their authentic communication style. Bring Intellectual Opposites into the Room: Avoid groupthink by deliberately including people who hold different perspectives when developing strategies or key communications. Having a constructive devil's advocate in the room sharpens your arguments and prevents embarrassing blind spots. SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube Connect with Beth Sherman: Website | LinkedIn | The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring Episode 189 Featuring Beth Sherman

September 14, 202621 min

Why "Winging It" Is Killing Your Leadership with Neil Mullarkey

Think great leaders have every conversation and presentation scripted to perfection? Think again. In this dynamic archive episode of Connected Leadership Bytes , Andy Lopata welcomes back comedy legend and author Neil Mullarkey ( In The Moment ). Neil dismantles the dangerous myth of "winging it"—revealing that panicking in the wings because you haven't prepared is the exact opposite of true improvisation. Real improv means preparing meticulously, and then having the emotional agility to let go of your agenda when reality shifts. Drawing on decades of performance with The Comedy Store Players, Neil explains why the modern workplace requires leaders to step away from the "mask of perfection." Learn why high-stakes client pitches fall apart when presenters cling rigidly to slide decks, and discover the creative trick used in the Friends writers' room to unlock breakthrough ideas. This episode is an essential guide to psychological safety, radical listening, and the art of leading without a script. What You Will Learn In This Episode: The "Winging It" Illusion: Why panicking in the wings is rooted in fear, and how true improvisation allows you to comfortably step into the "not knowing." The Slide Deck Trap: Why an elite consulting firm lost a massive deal by refusing to put down their prepared presentation, and how the "Yes, And" mindset prevents this disaster. The Friends Writers' Room Tactic: Why pitching a deliberately terrible idea during a meeting gives your team the psychological safety to innovate. The Lawyer's Revelation: Why 15 years of technical expertise proved that client retention has almost nothing to do with the advice, and everything to do with the relationship. Actionable Insights: Treat Objections as "Offers": When a client or team member rejects your proposal or interrupts your agenda, do not become defensive. In improv terms, treat their pushback as an "offer." Acknowledge their point immediately and pivot into curiosity: "That’s interesting—tell me more about why that approach won't work for you." Take the "Oxygen Pause": When caught off-guard by a challenging question, do not waffle. Take a deliberate, two-second breath. To you, the silence feels like an eternity; to the audience, it signals confidence, composure, and gravitas while giving your brain the oxygen it needs to formulate a thoughtful response. Role-Model Vulnerability in Brainstorming: If you want your team to speak up and offer unconventional solutions, you must lower the stakes. Intentionally float a rough, imperfect, or left-field idea early in the meeting. By showing that you don't fear being wrong, you remove the pressure of perfection from everyone else. SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube Connect with Neil Mullarkey: Website | Instagram | The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring Episode 188 Featuring Neil Mullarkey

September 7, 202653 min

Courage Over Confidence with Charlie Whyman

How do you successfully transition into leading a highly regulated, technical industry like aviation with zero sector experience? In this wide-ranging and deeply personal episode, host Andy Lopata is joined by Charlie Whyman, Managing Director of aviation consultancy TGIS Aviation, to explore the reality of non-traditional leadership. Charlie shares how she used pure curiosity and relationship-building to navigate the complex world of engine asset management and convinced her co-owners to pivot their entire business strategy. She opens up about the realities of being a female leader in a male-dominated field, her late discovery of neurodivergence, and the "courage to be disliked." Charlie also shares a vulnerable, firsthand account of a professional character assassination, revealing how a call to a trusted friend in her personal network helped her identify her core values of fairness and justice. From workplace "love languages" to managing the balance of "Rock Stars" and "Superstars," this episode is a true masterclass in relational leadership. About Our Guest: Charlie Whyman helps highly capable people close the gap between knowing and doing by getting honest about the fear that keeps them stuck. An engineer by background, a sales and marketing expert by accident, and a Managing Director by invitation, Charlie has spent nearly two decades conducting live experiments in what fear actually does to capable people, and what it takes to move forward anyway. As one of the few female MDs in the aviation sector, Charlie’s frameworks—including Clear the AIR™ (Avoid, Ignore, React) and the OTTER Framework™ —help technical specialists, engineers, founders, and leaders build momentum and challenge the core myth of personal development: that you need confidence before you can act. What we Discussed In This Episode: The Zero-Experience Jump: How Charlie approached her transition into managing an aviation business by securing dedicated time with the owners and using networking events to listen, learn, and ask questions. The Curiosity Approach to Sales: Why natural curiosity and a desire to learn, build deeper trust and generate more business than traditional, aggressive sales tactics. Code-Switching and Embracing Difference: Charlie’s 25-year history in male-dominated fields and how she stopped trying to blend in and started using her differences as a memorable asset. Leveraging Your Personal Network: The vital role that personal relationships play in professional life. The User Guide to Leadership: Charlie’s practical tool for her team— How to Work with Charlie Without Losing Your Mind —and how she navigates difficult conversations. Workplace Love Languages: Understanding how different team members psychologically give and receive praise, and why leaders must match those individual needs. Rock Stars vs. Superstars: Applying Kim Scott's framework to manage the balance between stable, execution-focused "Rock Stars" (who do not want promotions) and high-ambition, opportunity-seeking "Superstars." Resources Mentioned in this Episode: Charlie’s Frameworks: Clear the AIR™ (Avoiding, Ignoring, Reacting) and the OTTER Framework™ Book Mentioned: Nobody Believes You: Become a Leader People Will Follow by Jenny Field (Referencing the concept of being "likable, not liked") Book Mentioned: Radical Candor by Kim Scott (Referencing "Rock Stars" vs. "Superstars") Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube Connect with Charlie Whyman: Website | LinkedIn | The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring