Relationship Reset: Reignite, Reconnect, Rebuild

Hosted by Katie Rössler

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Episodes

164

Latest episode

Jun 2026

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EN-US

About the show

Feeling stuck in your relationship after years together? Relationship Reset is your go-to podcast for busy, high-achieving couples ready to break free from autopilot and rebuild a thriving partnership. Join relationship expert Katie Rössler, LPC for practical tools, real-life stories, and actionable advice to reignite passion, rebuild trust, and reconnect on a deeper level. Whether you’re navigating communication breakdowns, struggling with intimacy, or just feel disconnected, this podcast is here to help you transform your relationship—and create the love you’ve always envisioned. Perfect for couples who want to reignite their spark and reconnect with purpose. It’s never too late to hit reset.

Listen to episodes

60 recent

June 17, 2026Episode 2414 min

Resolution Isn't Repair And the Difference Is Wrecking Your Connection

Send us Fan MailYou resolved the argument. So why do you still feel terrible?You came to an agreement. You compromised. You closed the tab on yet another disagreement and still walked away feeling cold, distant, and vaguely like you won the argument but lost something that actually mattered. Sound familiar?In this episode, Katie breaks down one of the most misunderstood distinctions in long-term relationships: the difference between resolution and repair and why confusing the two is quietly driving high-achieving couples into roommate mode.Here's the uncomfortable truth: Gottman research shows that roughly 69% of relationship conflicts are never fully resolved. They're what researchers call "perpetual problems" rooted in personality, values, and life philosophy. If resolution is your only tool, you'll spend your marriage feeling like you're failing at something that was never actually fixable.What you'll take away from this episode:Why resolution is project mode and why project mode has a ceiling in intimate relationshipsWhat repair actually is (and why it has nothing to do with re-litigating the argument)Three practical repair tools you can use today, including one that will make your nervous system say absolutely not (but works anyway)A one-sentence repair phrase to try before you go to sleep tonightThis one is foundational.Watch the free free Repair TrainingRelationship Game Plan CallFree Conversation Starter Cards for CouplesCouples Goal Setting WorkbookSubmit a Dear Katie episode questionFollow Katie Rössler on Instagram

June 10, 2026Episode 2331 min

Affair Repair: The 5 Phases of Healing After Betrayal

Send us Fan MailCan a marriage actually survive an affair and come out stronger?Most people assume the answer is no. But marriage and family therapist Amanda Deverich, author of Affair Repair, has spent years walking couples through one of the most painful experiences a relationship can face — and what she's found might surprise you.In this episode, Katie sits down with Amanda to break down the five phases of affair repair: from the moment of discovery, through the crisis that follows, into the longer, harder work of rebuilding trust. They talk honestly about why affairs happen (hint: almost never for the reason you think), what "affair PTS" actually feels like, and why the uncertain or doubtful betrayer is far more common than anyone admits.You'll also hear about affair limerence — the uncontrollable pull toward the affair partner that can persist even after discovery — and why understanding what both partners are going through is the key to healing.Whether you're in the middle of this right now, quietly wondering if your marriage can be something more, or simply trying to understand how couples survive the unsurvivable — this conversation offers a roadmap. And a lot of grace.Amanda's book, Affair Repair, is available at affairrepair.com.Relationship Game Plan CallFree Conversation Starter Cards for CouplesCouples Goal Setting WorkbookSubmit a Dear Katie episode questionFollow Katie Rössler on Instagram

June 3, 2026Episode 2213 min

3 Ways You're Quietly Sabotaging Your Relationship (Without Realizing It)

Send us Fan MailLearn about the Weekly ResetAre you sabotaging your relationship without even knowing it?Most couples who end up stuck aren't selfish or uncaring — they're exhausted, busy, and running on autopilot. Somewhere between the kids, the career, and the endless to-do lists, they stopped doing the small things that actually keep a relationship alive. And nobody ever told them those small things were the whole game.In this episode, Katie breaks down three specific habits that quietly erode connection over time — patterns that show up in even the most loving, committed relationships. You'll learn why resentment builds not from selfishness but from assumptions, why "making the tension stop" is not the same as actually repairing something, and why the moment you feel like you already know everything about your partner is exactly when you should be most concerned.The good news? None of these are character flaws — and all of them are fixable. Katie shares three practical, low-stakes tips you can use this week, plus one simple habit that interrupts all three patterns at once.If you've ever had the same argument on repeat, felt like your partner stopped seeing you, or wondered when you two stopped actually talking — this episode is for you.🎧 Listen now, and check out Weekly Reset, Katie's six-week program that teaches couples how to build a weekly check-in that actually works.Relationship Game Plan CallFree Conversation Starter Cards for CouplesCouples Goal Setting WorkbookSubmit a Dear Katie episode questionFollow Katie Rössler on Instagram

May 27, 2026Episode 2114 min

How High-Achieving Couples Quietly Become Strangers

Send us Fan MailLearn about the Weekly ResetWhen is the last time you and your partner had a real conversation — not about the kids, the schedule, or what needs to happen this week? If you're struggling to answer that, you're not alone, and you're not failing. You're just caught in a pattern that almost every high-achieving couple falls into sooner or later.In this episode, Katie gets honest about what she calls the "great logistics era" of her own marriage — the season when everything looked great on paper and she and her husband were quietly becoming strangers. Because here's the thing: the same drive that makes high achievers so successful at work can hollow out your connection at home if you let it run unchecked.Today you'll learn:Why most long-term couples accidentally become co-CEOs of a household corporation — and stop being partnersWhat Dr. John Gottman's research says about what actually erodes connection over time (it's not the big fights)The difference between "project mode" and "connection mode" — and why mixing them is quietly killing your intimacyThree practical actions you can take this week to start shifting the dynamicThis episode isn't about blaming either of you. It's about seeing the pattern clearly — because once you can see it, you can change it.Ready to stop winging it? Katie's six-week live program, the Weekly Reset, starts June 10. It gives you and your partner a real framework for check-ins that actually stick — with live coaching and community support. Early bird pricing ends June 1. Learn more and register here.Relationship Game Plan CallFree Conversation Starter Cards for CouplesCouples Goal Setting WorkbookSubmit a Dear Katie episode questionFollow Katie Rössler on Instagram

May 20, 2026Episode 2013 min

We Built a Great Life. So Why Do I Feel Like I've Disappeared?

Send us Fan MailHave you looked at your partner lately and thought, "I don't even recognize us anymore"? You're not alone and it's not a sign that your marriage is on the rocks. In this episode of Relationship Reset, Katie shares a story about a couple who independently, without ever comparing notes, said almost the exact same thing in her office: "I don't really know who I am anymore."What follows is one of the most honest conversations Katie has had on the show about identity drift in long-term relationships — and why it doesn't just happen to one partner. The woman who disappears into competence and caretaking. The man who quietly hands himself over to responsibility and provision. Two people, one marriage, both lost — and still in love.You'll learn why the Venn diagram of your relationship gets out of balance over time, why jumping straight to couples work often misses the real issue, and what it actually looks like to reclaim yourself before you can reconnect with each other. Katie also shares three practical tools you can use this week: a personal tagline check, a question to ask your partner that you don't already know the answer to, and how to identify one thing in your life that's uniquely, unapologetically yours.This one is for the couples who are doing everything right on the outside — and quietly wondering, is this it?Relationship Game Plan CallFree Conversation Starter Cards for CouplesCouples Goal Setting WorkbookSubmit a Dear Katie episode questionFollow Katie Rössler on Instagram

May 13, 2026Episode 1929 min

"Is This Still My Partner?": Keeping Your Relationship Strong Through Perimenopause with Lauren Tetenbaum

Send us Fan MailWhat happens to your relationship when your body starts changing in ways you don't recognize — and neither does your partner?Perimenopause is one of the most under-discussed transitions in a long-term relationship, and it doesn't just affect the woman going through it. It affects both of you. In this episode, Katie sits down with Lauren Tuttenbaum — licensed psychotherapist, perinatal mental health specialist, and author of Millennial Menopause — to talk honestly about how to keep your relationship solid through one of midlife's biggest shifts.You'll learn:What physical and emotional changes to actually expect (and why up to 70% of women experience mood swings during perimenopause)How to start the conversation before things get hard — and what to say when you're already in the thick of itWhy "checking in" regularly is the simplest tool most couples skipWhat to do when one of you is thinking "should I stay or should I go?"A surprisingly powerful homework assignment that starts with one chapter of a bookWhether you're in your late 30s and want to get ahead of it, or you're mid-40s and wondering why everything feels different — this episode is your roadmap to navigating perimenopause as a team.🎧 Listen now and if this resonates, grab Lauren's book Millennial Menopause at millennialmenopause.com. And if your relationship could use a reset beyond this episode, Katie's couples coaching offers the strategic support to help you two reconnect — on purpose.Connect with LaurenInstagramLinkedinRelationship Game Plan CallFree Conversation Starter Cards for CouplesCouples Goal Setting WorkbookSubmit a Dear Katie episode questionFollow Katie Rössler on Instagram

May 6, 2026Episode 1832 min

The Leg Your Relationship Lost Without You Noticing with Dr. Margaret Cochran

Send us Fan MailSomething quietly disappeared from your relationship — and chances are, you didn't even see it go.It wasn't the big blowup. It wasn't a dramatic turning point. It was something smaller, slower, and way more dangerous. In this episode, Katie sits down with Dr. Margaret Cochran — transpersonal psychologist, licensed clinical social worker, and 25-year clinical veteran — to talk about the one thing long-term couples lose first, and why losing it puts everything else at risk.Dr. Cochran introduces her 3 P's Framework — Passion, Play, and Productivity — the three legs holding your relationship up while life presses down from above. Most couples assume they're solid because two legs are still standing. But that missing third leg? It's been gone longer than you think.You'll walk away knowing how to actually check in on your relationship's health, what renegotiating your "relationship contract" looks like at every stage, and the exact language to use when life gets messy, hard conversations can't wait, or one of you is carrying way too much.This isn't about finding more time. It's about finally using it differently.Connect with Dr. Cochran:Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-margaret-cochran/Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drmargaretcochranInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/doctorcochran/Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@drmargaretcochranFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/drmcochranWebsite: https://www.drcochran.com/Relationship Game Plan CallFree Conversation Starter Cards for CouplesCouples Goal Setting WorkbookSubmit a Dear Katie episode questionFollow Katie Rössler on Instagram

April 29, 2026Episode 1715 min

Conflict Avoidant? Here's What It's Costing Your Relationship

Send us Fan MailAre you keeping the peace… or just keeping quiet?There's a conversation you've been meaning to have for weeks. Maybe months. You know the one. And every time the moment comes, something stops you — the timing's not right, the weekend was good, you don't want to start something. So you let it go. Again.In this episode, Katie breaks down conflict avoidance — what it actually is (hint: it's sneakier than you think), why high-achieving couples are especially prone to it, and what it's quietly costing your relationship over time.You'll learn:Why "we don't really fight" isn't the relationship win it sounds likeHow avoidance shows up in successful, emotionally intelligent people — and why it makes total senseThe real difference between a strategic pause and full-on avoidanceWhat unspoken resentment actually does to connection over timeThree practical tools you can use this week to start opening the doorKatie also shares the I Noticed / I Feel / I Need framework — a simple, three-part structure that gives you a map for the conversation you've been putting off, without it turning into a blowup or going absolutely nowhere.Because here's the truth: your relationship didn't get here because of the big fights. It got here because of the small conversations that never happened.Relationship Game Plan CallFree Conversation Starter Cards for CouplesCouples Goal Setting WorkbookSubmit a Dear Katie episode questionFollow Katie Rössler on Instagram

April 22, 2026Episode 1612 min

We're Fine. (But Something Feels Off.)

Send us Fan MailYou don't have to be falling apart for something to be off. In this episode, Katie gets personal — sharing what she noticed in her own marriage when life looked perfectly fine on the outside but felt quietly hollow on the inside. This is the episode for the couple who keeps saying we're fine while something in the gut whispers but are we, really?Katie unpacks what autopilot actually looks like in high-achieving relationships — not checked-out and obvious, but productive, organized, and running like a machine while the real relationship quietly gets moved to the bottom of the list. She calls it "roommate mode," and if you've been there, you'll recognize it immediately.In this episode, you'll hear:Why high achievers are especially vulnerable to the sneaky kind of autopilotHow what's unaddressed inside you leaks into your relationship (without you realizing it)The two words Katie chose to guide her year — and what shifted in her marriage because of itThree practical steps to start stepping off autopilot this weekHow one person changing the dynamic can shift the entire relationship systemYou don't need your partner to go first. You just need one person willing to start — and that can be you.🎁 Grab the free 18 Questions for Couples: perfect for a date night, a road trip, or just a quiet evening on the couch.Relationship Game Plan CallFree Conversation Starter Cards for CouplesCouples Goal Setting WorkbookSubmit a Dear Katie episode questionFollow Katie Rössler on Instagram

April 15, 2026Episode 1536 min

I Am a Triangle: What Living Abroad Does to Your Marriage

Send us Fan MailYou moved to another country, fell in love with a new version of life — maybe even a new version of your partner — and then something shifted. You came back different. They came back different. And nobody warned you that reentry might be the hardest part of the whole adventure.In this episode, Katie sits down with Naomi Hathaway, founder of the viral I Am a Triangle movement and creator of Leaving Well — a practice that's helping individuals, couples, and organizations navigate transitions with intention, not just survival mode.Together, Katie and Naomi unpack the geometry of identity change: what it means to be a square (home), move to a circle (new country), and become a triangle — someone who can never fully go back, but also never fully belongs somewhere new. And if you add kids, cultures, or a partner from another country? You become a star. (Yes, in the best and most complicated way.)You'll walk away understanding:Why you fell in love with one version of your partner and came home to anotherHow couples can make the leave or stay decision together without resentmentWhy writing down your "why" might be the most underrated relationship toolWhat "Leaving Well" looks like — in moves, in jobs, and in lifeThis one is for every couple who has lived abroad, moved across the world together, or simply felt like strangers in a life they built.Connect with Naomi:Instagram: https://instagram.com/naomihattaway LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/naomihattaway Relationship Game Plan CallFree Conversation Starter Cards for CouplesCouples Goal Setting WorkbookSubmit a Dear Katie episode questionFollow Katie Rössler on Instagram