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August 21, 2026Episode 10821 min

What Are We Amplifying?

What Are We Amplifying? Note: read the article version of this podcast at DonnKing.com/108Art . I use tools to externalize parts of my brain. That sounds more dramatic than it is. A grocery list does it. So does an address book, a mind map, a voice memo, or a conversation with a friend. They let me move something outside my head so I can remember it, examine it, rearrange it, or think about it differently. Artificial intelligence can do that, too. These days, that raises all sorts of questions about creativity, writing, and what remains distinctly human when machines can do things we once thought belonged exclusively to us. In this episode, I’m less interested in deciding whether AI is inherently good or bad than in asking a question I find much more useful: What are we amplifying? The Big Takeaway Human beings have always extended themselves through tools. The important question isn’t simply whether we use them. It’s what we’re using them to extend. Do we become more human, or less? A tool can amplify creativity, judgment, curiosity, and clear thinking. It can also amplify carelessness, dishonesty, and bad judgment. Yes, the technology matters (and that’s not yet another AI-ism; it’s just true). But the human using it remains the one essential element in the outcome. In This Episode * Why Plato’s ancient concern about writing and memory sounds surprisingly familiar today. * How grocery lists, mind maps, notebooks, and conversations externalize parts of our thinking. * Why I think AI may work more like an amplifier than a replacement for human creativity. * What the current anxiety about AI in publishing means for the choices I’m making as a writer. * Why I care more about the value of a finished book than the particular tools used to create it. * What Friedrich Nietzsche’s 1882 experiment with an early typewriter can teach us about how our tools shape our thinking. * Why supposedly “AI-ish” writing habits such as antithesis and em dashes aren’t exactly new inventions. * The questions I think matter more than simply asking whether a particular technology is good or bad. A Few Practical Questions When I’m deciding whether any tool belongs in my work or life, these are the questions I want to ask: * Does this help me think more deeply? * Does it help me communicate more clearly? * Does it help me create something worth creating? * Does it help me treat other people with greater dignity and respect? * Does it help me become more fully the person I actually want to be? Those questions apply whether the tool is a notebook, an iPhone, a calculator, a mind map, or artificial intelligence. Quote to Ponder “We’ve always extended ourselves through our tools. We don’t need to stop doing that. We just need to make sure that what we’re extending is worth amplifying.” Resources and People Mentioned * Plato’s Phaedrus — the ancient dialogue containing Socrates’ account of concerns that writing would weaken memory * Joanna Penn — writer and publishing entrepreneur who encourages creatives to “double down on being human” in the age of AI * Marshall McLuhan — communication theorist associated with the phrase “the medium is the message.” The original book’s title is actually a little different: The Medium Is the Massage . This is a rare instance where an ebook would absolutely not communicate the author’s intent. You can get the print book directly from the publisher . You might also want to read Marshall McLuhan Explained . * Friedrich Nietzsche — philosopher who began using the Malling-Hansen Writing Ball in 1882 when problems with his eyesight made handwriting difficult * My books — which might support you in your own creative journey. I write books that mentor from the shadows, blending storytelling, humor, and humanity to help readers grow, serve others well, and stay human in a complicated world. The point isn’t that every use of every tool is good. Tools can be used carelessly, dishonestly, destructively, or lazily. But we’ve been extending our minds through tools for thousands of years. The question I want to keep asking is what we’re choosing to amplify. If you get value from the show, consider supporting us in one of the following ways. You can make a one-time contribution or sign up for regular support through Buy Me a Coffee . You can also subscribe on Substack for free OR upgrade to a paid subscription. Your support helps me continue helping you and others, and thank you in advance! All subscribers now receive the following: * The “Big Takeaway” * A bulleted summary of the episode * Practical tips from the episode * A quote to ponder * Prefer text? We turn each podcast into an article . Plus, Founding Members receive ebook copies of all my books as well as a sponsorship message on the podcast at least once a month. That’s our way for saying “thanks for the support!” This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kingschronicles.substack.com/subscribe

August 14, 202648 min

You Don’t Have to Know Where You’re Going

[Note: if you would rather read an article instead of watching or listening, you can read such here .] Sometimes the best conversations start because somebody says something almost in passing. I was listening to Kevin Tumlinson on The Word Slinger Podcast when he mentioned that, for all the talking he does about writing and publishing, he doesn’t get to talk about the actual craft of writing as often as you might expect. Maybe, he suggested, he just needed somebody to ask him questions. Well, I can ask questions. That led to an email, a bad pun about “Kevin on Kraft” (yes, we know it’s cheesy—maybe we’ll make it “Kevin on Craft”), and eventually this conversation. Kevin and I decided to borrow an idea from Rachael Herron and Sacha Black, who periodically record a conversation together and then each use it on their respective podcasts. So you may encounter this conversation here on The Alignment Show , over on The Word Slinger Podcast , or, knowing Kevin, possibly on the back of a cereal box. What started as a conversation about writing craft quickly became something broader: creativity, discovery, getting unstuck, allowing imperfect work to exist, and recognizing that the creative process rarely follows the neat categories we use when we talk about it. The Big Takeaway One idea kept resurfacing for me: you don’t have to know everything before you begin. Kevin often starts a novel with little more than a title and an interesting possibility. The characters emerge as he writes. The plot develops alongside them. And when he gets stuck, he doesn’t necessarily take that as evidence that something has gone wrong. Sometimes he loops back through what he has already written. Sometimes he throws something ridiculous into the story just to see what happens. As Kevin put it, writing gives us an advantage real life doesn’t: “The laws of physics do not apply. So you can, in fact, travel through time and alter the past.” You can discover in chapter six that you needed something in chapter three, then go back and put it there. That sounds obvious once you say it. But it’s remarkably easy to forget when you’re staring at a draft and trying to get everything right the first time. In This Conversation Kevin and I talk about: * Why this experiment in shared podcasting started in the first place, and where “Kevin on Kraft (not cheese)” might go from here. * Kevin’s unusual habit of beginning many of his books with the title , then asking what interesting or ironic idea might be hiding inside it. * Why separating “plot” from “character” can be useful for studying craft even though they’re deeply intertwined when we actually write. * Discovery writing versus outlining, and why most writers probably fall somewhere along a spectrum rather than neatly into one camp. * Why trying to produce a perfect first draft can make finishing the book much harder. * Kevin’s “looping” technique for getting unstuck: going back through earlier material, reading and revising until he regains momentum. * What happens when looping doesn’t work, including the surprisingly useful strategy of throwing something absurd into the story and seeing what it reveals. * Kevin’s “ash bin,” where deleted scenes and discarded material can live instead of disappearing forever. * Why originality usually doesn’t mean inventing something nobody has ever seen before. As Kevin says, the goal is often “the same, but different.” * Why creativity isn’t limited to people who call themselves writers, artists, or creators. Problem solving itself is creative work. Something to Try If you’re working on something creative and you’re stuck, Kevin offers two approaches worth trying. First, loop back . Read what you already have. Make small adjustments as you go. See whether returning to the material gives you enough momentum to move through the place where you stopped. If that doesn’t work, try something unreasonable. Blow up the spaceship. You don’t have to keep it. The point is to break whatever assumptions have trapped you and force yourself to ask new questions. The absurd choice may disappear in revision, or it may reveal the direction the story needed all along. And remember: nothing you’ve already written is sacred simply because you wrote it. You can add something earlier, remove something that no longer belongs, or save good material for another day. Quote to Ponder “All the notes are the same. You’re not inventing new notes. It’s all in how you arrange them. And that’s what makes the music.” — Kevin Tumlinson That applies to considerably more than writing. About Kevin Tumlinson Kevin Tumlinson is an author with more than 70 published books, a longtime independent publishing advocate, and the host of The Word Slinger Podcast . He previously served as Director of Marketing and PR at Draft2Digital and is also one of the co-hosts of Writers, Ink . Kevin Tumlinson website The Word Slinger Podcast Kevin’s YouTube channel Resources Mentioned * Kevin Tumlinson * The Word Slinger Podcast — YouTube and Substack * Kevin’s YouTube channel * Writers, Ink * Rachael Herron / Ink in Your Veins * Sacha Black / The Rebel Author Podcast * Joanna Penn / The Creative Penn Podcast * On Writing by Stephen King — Amazon or Bookshop.org * 20 Master Plots: And How to Build Them — Amazon or Bookshop.org * Scrivener * The Alignment Show Join the Conversation This is something of an experiment for Kevin and me, and we’d genuinely like to know how it lands. Would you like to hear more conversations like this? Are there aspects of writing craft you’d particularly like me to ask Kevin about? And even if you’re not a writer, did you find something in the conversation that applies to your own creative work? Leave a comment here on Substack, or join the conversation on Kevin’s YouTube channel . We already have more things we could talk about. Whether “Kevin on Kraft” becomes a regular thing remains to be seen. But I suspect we’re not finished talking. If you get value from the show, consider supporting us in one of the following ways. You can make a one-time contribution or sign up for regular support through Buy Me a Coffee . You can also subscribe on Substack for free OR upgrade to a paid subscription. Your support helps me continue helping you and others, and thank you in advance! All subscribers now receive the following: * The “Big Takeaway” * A bulleted summary of the episode * Practical tips from the episode * A quote to ponder * Prefer text? We turn each podcast into an article. Plus, Founding Members receive ebook copies of all my books as well as a sponsorship message on the podcast at least once a month. That’s our way for saying “thanks for the support!” This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kingschronicles.substack.com/subscribe

August 10, 20261 min

The Alignment Show Is Back—and We’re Starting with a Conversation

Hi, friends. It’s been a while since we’ve had an episode of The Alignment Show , but we’re starting it back up again. We’ve been on hiatus for a few months as we experimented with different ways of connecting. While Substack Live is a perfectly viable channel, it just wasn’t working well for me. So we’re coming back to our usual format, and we’re starting off really well, I think. This coming Friday, what we intend to do is have a conversation between me and one of our “Stars in Alignment,” Kevin Tumlinson. Kevin has been on The Alignment Show several times, and we decided we would sit down and simply have a conversation. It’s not so much me hosting or him hosting. These episodes will be on both of our channels. We had a conversation that is the beginning of a series of conversations I think you’ll find interesting, whether you’re a writer or not. All of us are creative in one way or another, and there’s going to be material here that will be useful for you. So watch for that releasing this Friday on all your favorite channels. We’ll have it on Substack. We’ll have it on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and all the usual outlets. I’ll look forward to sitting down with you then, here on The Alignment Show . If you just want written posts and don’t want to get notified about our podcasts, you can adjust what you receive from us here. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kingschronicles.substack.com/subscribe

March 20, 202653 min

From Banjo to Memoir: Finding Meaning in the Messy Middle of Life

I wasn’t quite sure what to expect going into this conversation with Matthew Check, but I knew it would be interesting. What I didn’t expect was just how layered it would be. Matthew is a musician-turned-author whose memoir, What Would Philip Roth Do? , weaves together love, identity, creativity, and a fair amount of humor. But what stayed with me after our conversation wasn’t just the story itself. It was the process behind it—the discipline, the vulnerability, and the willingness to tell the truth even when it would be easier not to. We talked about what it means to write honestly, how creativity actually works (hint: it’s not always inspiration), and why memoir is less about recording events and more about making sense of them. There’s also something deeper running through all of this. Matthew’s story—whether he’s talking about bluegrass music, relationships, or imagined conversations with Philip Roth—keeps circling back to identity. Who am I? How did I get here? And what do I do with that truth once I see it clearly? If you’ve ever wrestled with your own story, or wondered whether it’s worth telling, I think you’ll find something here. Resources Mentioned * Matthew Check’s website * What Would Philip Roth Do? * Matthew Check on Spotify and Apple Music (linked from his website) * Bright Eyes: Surviving Our Monsters and Learning to Live Without Them by Bridey Thelen Heidel (mentioned in conversation) * Philip Roth’s books The Big Takeaway Telling your story honestly is less about getting every detail right and more about having the courage to say, “This is how I see my life,” and standing behind it. Bulleted Summary * Memoir is crafted, not just remembered. It requires shaping events into meaning * Creativity isn’t only inspiration; it’s also discipline, repetition, and showing up * Humor can open the door to truth, especially in painful or vulnerable moments * A good editor goes beyond fixing your writing to helping you discover what you’re really saying * Identity often reveals itself through unexpected connections (like bluegrass and Jewish heritage) * Writing a memoir forces a deeper question: “Am I willing to be this honest in public?” Practical Tips * Don’t wait for inspiration. Build a habit of showing up consistently * Find an editor or collaborator who understands your voice, not just your grammar * Write freely first; decide later what stays and what goes * Use humor where it naturally arises. It can make difficult truths more accessible * Engage with other writers or creators. You’re more likely to find the right collaborators that way * If you’re telling your own story, focus on meaning, not just chronology Quote to Ponder “I really do want to make a statement about how I see my life and what happened.” When Your Life Becomes the Material In this episode of The Alignment Show , I sat down with Matthew Check to talk about his memoir, What Would Philip Roth Do? But the conversation quickly moved beyond the book itself. At its core, this is a conversation about what it means to take your own life seriously enough to shape it into a story. Matthew didn’t set out to write a book. He started with a writing class, working through exercises, trying to figure out what he had to say. Over time, something began to emerge: a pattern connecting his love of music, his relationships, and his search for identity. The book took shape slowly, over years, through revision, reflection, and a lot of back-and-forth with his editor. The Myth of the Solo Writer One of the more refreshing parts of this conversation was Matthew’s honesty about the writing process. There’s a common assumption that writers sit alone, produce something brilliant, and send it off into the world. That wasn’t his experience at all. His editor played a central role—not just refining the writing, but helping him discover what the story actually was. Sometimes that meant pushing him to go deeper. Sometimes it meant pulling him back. Either way, it was a collaborative process. It’s a good reminder that writing, even when it’s deeply personal, is rarely a solo act. Creativity: Inspiration vs. Discipline Matthew’s background as a musician added another layer to the conversation. Songwriting, for him, often comes in bursts of inspiration. A melody appears. Lyrics follow. The song almost writes itself. Writing a book, on the other hand, requires something different. It’s less about waiting for the moment and more about creating the conditions for progress—sitting down, doing the work, and continuing even when it feels like a chore. There’s a parallel here to almost any meaningful work. The initial spark matters. But what carries it forward is discipline. Humor as a Path to Truth The humor of life is one of the defining features of Matthew’s memoir. Even in moments that are awkward, painful, or deeply personal, there’s often a thread of self-deprecation or wit running through the story. Humor, in this case, becomes a way of telling the truth without becoming overwhelmed by it. It creates space for both the writer and the reader to engage with difficult material. The Risk of Being Honest At some point in the process, Matthew realized he was going to publish something very revealing. The real challenge of writing such a book lay not in the act of writing itself, but the decision to let other people see it. Memoir raises a question that most forms of writing avoid: How honest am I willing to be in public? For Matthew, answering that question required a kind of courage he hadn’t needed before. Identity in Unexpected Places The connection between Matthew’s Jewish identity and his love of bluegrass music honestly surprised me. At first glance, those two might seem unrelated. But as he described it, they deeper connections in shared musical structures, emotional tones, even cultural overlaps. It reminded me that identity isn’t always as straightforward as we assume. Sometimes it shows up in places we wouldn’t expect. What This Conversation Leaves Me With If there’s one thing I keep coming back to after this conversation, it’s this: Your story doesn’t have to be extraordinary to matter. But it does have to be honest. And honesty—real honesty—takes work. It takes reflection. It takes revision. And sometimes, it takes someone else helping you see what you’re actually trying to say. * What part of your own story have you been hesitant to tell—and why? * Do you think you could write your life honestly, or would you hold something back? * Where in your life have you seen discipline matter more than inspiration? Respond to these and other ideas in the comments. If you get value from the show, consider supporting us in one of the following ways. You can make a one-time contribution or sign up for regular support through Buy Me a Coffee . You can also subscribe on Substack for free OR upgrade to a paid subscription. Your support helps me continue helping you and others, and thank you in advance! All subscribers now receive the following: * The “Big Takeaway” * A bulleted summary of the episode * Practical tips from the episode * A quote to ponder * Prefer text? We turn each podcast into an article. Plus, Founding Members receive ebook copies of all my books as well as a sponsorship message on the podcast at least once a month. That’s our way for saying “thanks for the support!” King's Chronicles is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kingschronicles.substack.com/subscribe

March 6, 202651 min

They Tried to Bury Us: Finding Strength, Identity, and Healing Through Story

Some conversations stay with you long after the recording ends. This was one of them. In this episode of The Alignment Show , I talk with Mia Godfrey—life coach, speaker, and author of Buried, Not Broken: A Memoir of Survival, Sisterhood, and Starting Over . Mia grew up in Romania during the communist regime, immigrated to the United States, and later walked through the devastating loss of her sister. What began as a promise between two sisters eventually became a memoir about resilience, healing, and the courage to reclaim your voice. We talk about grief, identity, and the surprising ways writing can help us process life’s hardest moments. Mia shares how her sister’s encouragement led her to write their story, even though she initially resisted the idea. Along the way, we explore how painful experiences can sometimes become the soil where new growth begins. One of the ideas that struck me most was something Mia’s mother used to say: “They tried to bury us, but they didn’t know we were seeds.” That image captures the spirit of this conversation perfectly. If you’ve ever wondered whether your hardest chapters might someday become part of a meaningful story, I think you’ll find Mia’s journey worth hearing. Resources Mentioned * Buried, Not Broken : A Memoir of Survival, Sisterhood, and Starting Over by Mia Godfrey * Creating While Caring by Donn King * Toastmasters International The Big Takeaway Sometimes the experiences that feel like they are burying us are actually planting the roots that allow us to grow stronger, clearer, and more aligned with who we really are. Bulleted Summary * Mia grew up in Romania during the communist regime, where scarcity and fear shaped daily life. * Her sister Mona encouraged her to write their story shortly before Mona’s death from cancer in 2023. * Writing the memoir became part of Mia’s healing process after deep grief and loss. * The book’s structure reflects how memory actually works—more like a patchwork quilt than a straight timeline. * Mia learned to embrace her identity, accent, and story rather than trying to hide them to fit in. * Her message today focuses on helping people—especially those over forty—rediscover purpose and step into their next chapter. Practical Tips * Write before you’re ready. Journaling can uncover insights and healing you didn’t expect. * Share your story gradually. Even showing one page to a trusted person can be a powerful step forward. * Reframe adversity. Instead of asking “Why did this happen?” consider “What can grow from this?” * Embrace your identity. The things you once tried to hide may become the very things that help others. * Look for the next chapter. Life transitions after forty can be a time of clarity rather than crisis. Quote to Ponder “They tried to bury us, but they didn’t know we were seeds.” If you prefer reading over listening, here is an article version of our conversation. When the Hardest Chapters Become the Soil for Growth In this episode of The Alignment Show , I talk with Mia Godfrey about resilience, identity, and what it means to rebuild life after profound loss. Mia is a life coach, speaker, and the author of Buried, Not Broken . Her story begins in Romania during the communist era, where poverty, fear, and scarcity shaped everyday life. Yet even in those conditions, she remembers her childhood home as a place filled with love, laughter, and resilience. Her mother had a remarkable way of reframing hardship. Even when food was scarce and families stood in line for hours for a small ration of bread, she reminded her children that they were still rich in what mattered most: family, faith, and community. That mindset would become one of the foundations of Mia’s life. A Promise Between Sisters Years later, Mia’s sister Mona was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. During Mona’s illness, the two sisters began writing down stories from their childhood—memories they had once promised to keep secret. Mona believed their story might help others facing hardship. After Mona passed away in 2023, Mia initially put the journals away and intended never to open them again. Grief, however, has its own way of reshaping our direction. Encouraged by a therapist and her husband, Mia eventually returned to the pages she had written. What began as private journaling slowly became something larger: a memoir. Writing as a Path to Healing One of the most powerful parts of Mia’s story is how writing changed her relationship with grief. She described how years of trauma had affected her sleep and emotional health. Yet after completing the book, something shifted. The process of telling the truth—of finally releasing long-held secrets—allowed her to let go of burdens she had carried since childhood. The book itself reflects that emotional journey. Rather than a traditional chronological memoir, Mia structured it as what she calls a “patchwork quilt of memories.” The narrative moves between different moments in her life, much the way memories actually surface. It’s messy. It’s nonlinear. And that’s exactly the point. Learning to Stop Hiding Another part of Mia’s story many listeners will recognize is her struggle to find her voice after immigrating to the United States. Because English was not her first language, she often felt self-conscious about her accent. At times people mocked it or dismissed her. For years she tried to make herself invisible—to blend in and avoid attention. Eventually she realized something important: the real battle wasn’t with other people’s opinions. It was with her own belief that she needed to change to belong. Today she embraces the very things she once tried to hide. Her accent, her story, and her experiences are now part of what allows her to connect with others. Buried… or Planted? One of the most memorable ideas from our conversation came from something Mia’s mother used to say: “They tried to bury us, but they didn’t know we were seeds.” It’s a powerful metaphor. When we’re buried, it can feel like the end of the story. But in the natural world, seeds must be buried before they grow. Mia now sees many of the painful events in her life through that lens. What once felt like endings were actually beginnings—moments when new roots were forming beneath the surface. Final Thoughts Alignment often emerges from the places we least expect. Sometimes the experiences that shape us most are the ones we would never choose. Yet when we face them honestly, they can become the foundation for deeper clarity, compassion, and purpose. Mia’s story is a reminder that even the hardest chapters may still be part of a much larger story. And sometimes, what feels like being buried is actually the beginning of growth. What part of Mia’s story resonated most with you? Feel free to share your reflections below. If you get value from the show, consider supporting us in one of the following ways. You can make a one-time contribution or sign up for regular support through Buy Me a Coffee . You can also subscribe on Substack for free OR upgrade to a paid subscription. Your support helps me continue helping you and others, and thank you in advance! All subscribers now receive the following: * The “Big Takeaway” * A bulleted summary of the episode * Practical tips from the episode * A quote to ponder * Prefer text? We turn each podcast into an article. Plus, Founding Members receive ebook copies of all my books as well as a sponsorship message on the podcast at least once a month. That’s our way for saying “thanks for the support!” King's Chronicles is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kingschronicles.substack.com/subscribe

February 21, 202616 min

Are You Responding to Facts… or to Your Story About Them?

Editor’s note: We’re grateful for all our listeners. We’ve been offering some added “perks” for paid subscribers, and we have realized that most if not all of those subscribers pay because they want to support our work, not because they get exclusive access to content. So we are experimenting with making all of our content here available to all subscribers. Thank you, thank you, thank you, and if you find value in what we do, please share us with others and upgrade your subscription as you see fit with our deepest gratitude. We are making this change as we complete our tech move completely into our space here on King’s Chronicles . This week I recorded a shorter solo episode — not filler, not a placeholder — but something I believe we genuinely need to talk about. In the cultural, social, and political climate we’re living in right now, assumptions are doing real damage. We react quickly. We interpret confidently. And we rarely pause long enough to ask whether what we think we heard is actually what was said. In this episode, I share a simple puzzle that got me — and yes, even fooled me — along with a personal story from a recent interview that illustrates just how powerful (and costly) our hidden assumptions can be. It’s not abstract. It’s not academic. It’s practical. If you’ve ever: * Reacted strongly and later realized you misheard * Assumed someone’s intention… and been wrong * Held back your voice because of what you thought someone meant Then this one’s for you. Listen in. I think it may shift the way you experience your next conversation. Resources Mentioned * Butterfly Copywriting (Val Roskens Tews): https://donnking.com/butterfly * My books (including Creating While Caring ): https://donnking.com/books * The puzzle image referenced in the episode (if you can’t see it where you’re listening to this, go to https://donnking.com/104 ) BONUS CONTENT 1. The Big Takeaway The most dangerous assumptions are the ones that feel obvious — because once something feels obvious, we stop questioning it. Awareness creates choice. And choice is where alignment begins. 2. Bulleted Summary * Our brains are prediction machines. We complete stories automatically. * Visual and emotional framing guide interpretation more than we realize. * Even expertise in communication does not prevent assumptions — it may simply make us faster at making them. * Most conflicts are not about what was said, but about what was inferred. * The same words, interpreted differently, can create entirely different lived experiences. * Slowing down to clarify intent is not weakness — it is precision. 3. Practical Tips * When you feel a strong reaction, ask: What part of this is observable fact, and what part is my interpretation? * Replace “I know what you meant” with “Help me understand what you meant.” * Before withdrawing or escalating, pause and ask: Is this inferred or confirmed? * Notice emotional certainty. The stronger the certainty, the more valuable the pause. * In meetings or difficult conversations, clarify intent explicitly rather than assuming tone. 4. Quote to Ponder “The most dangerous assumptions are the ones that feel obvious.” or “The goal isn’t perfection. It’s awareness. And once you have awareness, you have choice.” 5. Article Version (Blog-Style Episode Write-Up) The Assumption You Didn’t Know You Made In this solo episode of The Alignment Show, I explore something deceptively simple but profoundly consequential: the assumptions we don’t realize we’re making. In a world moving at high speed — culturally, socially, politically — we’re reacting quickly and interpreting confidently. But how often do we stop to ask whether what we believe we heard is actually what was said? A Puzzle That Revealed More Than I Expected I came across a graphic showing two people trapped on a rope bridge between two tigers, with sharks circling below. The caption read: “Every problem has a solution — how can both escape safely?” Most of us instantly assume “both” refers to the two humans. So did I. So did Lizzie — my name for ChatGPT. And that’s what made it fascinating. The question never specified “both humans.” It simply said “both.” One commenter pointed out that after the tigers eat the humans, the two tigers both escape safely. Dark? Yes. Accurate? Also yes. The lesson wasn’t about survival tactics. It was about how quickly our minds fill in missing meaning. Why Even Experts Get Caught I’ve spent a lifetime teaching communication — framing, ambiguity, inference. And I still made the assumption. Knowing how assumptions work doesn’t prevent them. Our brains are prediction machines. We don’t just receive information. We complete it. That’s how we function efficiently. The problem arises when we mistake completion for certainty. A Real-Life Example After recording an interview recently, my guest and I were chatting casually. She has a European accent and has lived in the U.S. since 2008. I told her I loved her accent. She told me that for years, when people said that, she assumed they were mocking her. Same words.Different assumption.Different experience. Because she believed the comment was sarcastic, she became hesitant to speak up in meetings. Her participation changed. Her confidence shifted. Nothing external changed. Only the interpretation. That internal story shaped her lived reality. Where Assumptions Hurt Most We rarely announce to ourselves, “I am now assigning motive to this person.” We just feel hurt.Or dismissed.Or defensive. And the feeling feels justified because the story feels obvious. But what if it’s filled in? Most arguments aren’t about what was said. They’re about what was inferred. When we respond to our interpretation instead of observable fact, clarity disappears. Moving from Awareness to Agency So what do we do? First, accept something uncomfortable: education doesn’t make us immune to misinterpretation. It just gives us tools to recover faster. Second, pause. Instead of:“I know what you meant.” Try:“Help me understand what you meant.” Instead of:“Obviously this is about…” Try:“Is this what you’re saying?” Clarification is not weakness. It is precision. The most dangerous assumptions are the ones that feel obvious. Awareness is the first step. But awareness is not the end goal. The end goal is agency. When you recognize that you are completing the story, you gain the ability to question it. Is this observable?Or inferred? Fact?Or interpretation? That single pause can be the difference between withdrawal and participation… conflict and clarity… silence and voice. And that is where alignment begins. Your Turn * Where have you recently discovered you were responding to a story you completed rather than a fact you observed? * What’s one conversation where a small pause could change the outcome? * Have you ever realized you misinterpreted someone’s intent? What shifted once you saw it? If you get value from the show, consider supporting us in one of the following ways. You can make a one-time contribution or sign up for regular support through Buy Me a Coffee . You can also subscribe on Substack for free OR upgrade to a paid subscription. Your support helps me continue helping you and others, and thank you in advance! All subscribers now receive the following: * The “Big Takeaway” * A bulleted summary of the episode * Practical tips from the episode * A quote to ponder * Prefer text? We turn each podcast into an article. Plus, Founding Members receive ebook copies of all my books as well as a sponsorship message on the podcast at least once a month. That’s our way for saying “thanks for the support!” King's Chronicles is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kingschronicles.substack.com/subscribe

February 13, 20261 hr 4 min

The Hidden Mechanics of Conflict (And How to Fix Them)

We’ve all had that moment. You walk away from a conversation thinking, How did that blow up so fast? Or worse, That’s not what I meant at all. In this episode of The Alignment Show , I sit down with Dr. Patricia Timerman Barbosa da Silva (known simply as Dr. T) to talk about what really happens between intention and perception. We recorded this conversation some months ago, and while a few references are time-stamped, the insights are anything but. What she shares here is timeless and deeply practical. Dr. T introduces what she calls the IAP Model — Intention, Action, Perception — a framework that helps explain why so many conflicts aren’t actually about the issue at hand. They’re about the gap between what we intend, what we do, and how it is received. If you’ve ever said, “You should have known what I meant,” this conversation may change how you approach your next difficult conversation. We explore: * Why silence rarely means what we assume it means * How “you always” and “you never” quietly escalate conflict * Why actions only “speak louder than words” when intentions are clear * How to interrupt destructive patterns before they spiral Dr. T brings both clinical expertise and lived experience. She’s candid about how many of these insights were born inside her own marriage. That honesty makes the conversation feel real rather than theoretical. This one isn’t abstract. It’s actionable. About Dr. T Dr. Patricia Timerman Barbosa da Silva is a psychotherapist, author, and founder of Advocate2Create. In her book Why Are We Fighting? , she introduces the IAP Model—Intention, Action, Perception—which she describes as a kind of “Google Translate” for human communication. With more than 12 years of experience, she specializes in grief, trauma, and couples therapy. She also conducts clinical evaluations for immigration cases, combining her mental health expertise with her background in immigration law. Resources Mentioned * Why Are We Fighting? by Dr. Patricia Timerman Barbosa da Silva * Advocate2Create , a website dedicated to Dr. T’s insights. * Rule of Three Interpretations training * The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman * Relationship Revival podcast * Donn’s books * Work with Donn to publish your book You can find shownotes for this episode and links to all our channels at https://DonnKing.com/103 . Remember that we have moved our home over to our new site at TheAlignmentShow.com . We encourage you to subscribe there! If you get value from the show, consider supporting us through Buy Me a Coffee . You can make a one-time contribution or sign up for regular support. Your support helps me continue helping you and others, and thank you in advance! You can also subscribe on Substack for free OR upgrade to a paid subscription to receive the following bonus material for each episode: * The “Big Takeaway” * A bulleted summary of the episode * Practical tips from the episode * A quote to ponder * Prefer text? We turn each podcast into an article. Plus, Founding Members receive ebook copies of all my books as well as a sponsorship message on the podcast at least once a month. That’s our way for saying “thanks for the support!” Note: if you accidentally subscribe on ConfidenceCultivators.com (which used to host the show), I will comp you the equivalent subscription on King’s Chronicles, the new home of The Alignment Show. Get full access to The Confidence Cultivator at confidencecultivator.substack.com/subscribe This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kingschronicles.substack.com/subscribe

January 15, 202659 min

Introversion, Identity, and the Courage to Be Real at Work

I’ve learned over the years that the most meaningful conversations often start with shared experience rather than shared credentials. This one did. In this episode of The Alignment Show , I sit down with Steve Friedman , an author, speaker, and longtime corporate leader who spent decades navigating professional life as an introvert before reinventing his work around writing, speaking, and supporting families affected by Down syndrome. Steve and I talk about masking, energy management, leadership, caregiving, and what it means to stretch your comfort zone without losing yourself in the process. We explore why introversion is so often misunderstood, how corporate culture rewards the loudest voices, and what changes when you finally stop pretending to be someone you’re not. This conversation isn’t about quick fixes or personal branding. It’s about authenticity, sustainability, and learning to live and work in ways that actually fit who you are. If you’ve ever felt worn out by performing a version of yourself that doesn’t quite feel true, I think you’ll find something here worth sitting with. What part of this conversation felt uncomfortably familiar to you? Share in the comments! Remember that you can find shownotes for this episode and links to all our channels at https://DonnKing.com/102 . Resources mentioned in this episode include: * Beyond Introversion, Steve Friedman’s site focused on introversion in professional and corporate settings, including articles, workshops, and books. (Site may have been discontinued, but I’m leaving the link here in case it comes back up. https://beyondintroversion.com .) * Beyond Down Syndrome , Steve Friedman’s resource hub for families and individuals affected by Down syndrome, covering different life stages, education, independence, and advocacy. https://beyonddownsyndrome.net * Steve’s LinkedIn , the primary social platform for connecting with Steve professionally. * Steve Friedman’s Books on Amazon, the place to find his published books on introversion and Down syndrome. * The Corporate Introvert , Steve’s book focused on navigating meetings, leadership, and networking as an introvert in corporate environments. * In Search of Courage: An Introvert’s Story , Steve’s first book, centered on personal reflection, career, and introversion. * Creating While Caring by Donn King. * All of Donn’s books . * Butterfly Copywriting , one of our sponsors. Remember that we have moved our home over to our new site at TheAlignmentShow.com . We encourage you to subscribe there! If you get value from the show, consider supporting us through Buy Me a Coffee . You can make a one-time contribution or sign up for regular support. Your support helps me continue helping you and others, and thank you in advance! You can also subscribe on Substack for free OR upgrade to a paid subscription to receive the following bonus material for each episode: * The “Big Takeaway” * A bulleted summary of the episode * Practical tips from the episode * A quote to ponder * Prefer text? We turn each podcast into an article. Plus, Founding Members receive ebook copies of all my books as well as a sponsorship message on the podcast at least once a month. That’s our way for saying “thanks for the support!” Note: if you accidentally subscribe on ConfidenceCultivators.com (which used to host the show), I will comp you the equivalent subscription on King’s Chronicles, the new home of The Alignment Show. Get full access to The Confidence Cultivator at confidencecultivator.substack.com/subscribe This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kingschronicles.substack.com/subscribe

January 6, 202619 min

After the Dumpster Fire: Rebuilding Rhythm, Meaning, and Creative Work

This is the first episode of The Alignment Show for 2026, and it’s a solo one. I wanted to start the year by speaking honestly about why consistency broke down over the past year, what that cost, and what it’s taken to begin rebuilding. This isn’t an episode about productivity hacks or polished plans. It’s about grief, caregiving, creative identity, and what it means to keep choosing alignment when control turns out to be mostly an illusion. In this episode, I talk about why I shifted the show to an audio-first rhythm, how I’m rethinking what support really means on Substack, and why writing has to remain central for me, even when everything else slows down. If you’ve ever had a season where “just showing up” felt like the only honest win, this conversation is for you. We really are all about community here. Thanks for showing up. Because of the nature of this episode, we didn’t mention sponsors in the audio. But if you would like to support the show, check out these resources. * My books can all be found at DonnKing.com/Books . You might want to bookmark that, since I have several in process. The latest published one is C reating While Caring , and soon there will be a companion book of devotionals for caregivers. Yet another book in that grouping is also in process, a reflective nonfiction book about formation, constraint, and the limits of control. * I’m considering helping to start an online support group specifically for creative people who find themselves now in a caregiving role. Your response will help me decide whether to pursue that or not. Go to DonnKing.com/CreatingCareCommunity . * We would really appreciate it if you would share this episode and this publication with your friends. Find everything about The Alignment Show and the regular supportive content we provide at King’s Chronicles on Substack . Remember that we have moved our home over to our new site at TheAlignmentShow.com . We encourage you to subscribe there! If you get value from the show, consider supporting us through Buy Me a Coffee . You can make a one-time contribution or sign up for regular support. Your support helps me continue helping you and others, and thank you in advance! You can also subscribe on Substack for free OR upgrade to a paid subscription to receive the following bonus material for each episode: * The “Big Takeaway” * A bulleted summary of the episode * Practical tips from the episode * A quote to ponder * Prefer text? We turn each podcast into an article. Plus, Founding Members receive ebook copies of all my books as well as a sponsorship message on the podcast at least once a month. That’s our way for saying “thanks for the support!” Note: if you accidentally subscribe on ConfidenceCultivators.com (which used to host the show), I will comp you the equivalent subscription on King’s Chronicles, the new home of The Alignment Show. Get full access to The Confidence Cultivator at confidencecultivator.substack.com/subscribe This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kingschronicles.substack.com/subscribe

December 12, 202557 min

Writing in Alignment: Miracles, Missions, and Letting Go

Rachael Herron returns to The Alignment Show, and as always, she brings a mix of honesty, wisdom, and grounded joy to the conversation. We talk about her new novel The Seven Miracles of Beatrix Holland and how writing it pulled her deeper into a long-running personal theme—letting go of control. We explore what happens when a story arrives before the plan does, why “mission” matters more than “goals,” and how creative work shifts when you stop writing to please the market and start writing from alignment. Along the way, we get into traditional vs. indie publishing, the surprising ways readers find niche work, and how a lifetime in 911 dispatch gave her an unusual brain for the unexpected plot twist. Whether you’re a writer, a creative professional, or anyone trying to live in closer alignment with your values, this conversation offers a steadying mix of humor, insight, and permission to trust the thing that calls to you. Remember that you can find shownotes for this episode and links to all our channels at https://DonnKing.com/100 . Resources mentioned in this episode include: * Our sponsor, Butterfly Copywriting. Check it out at https://DonnKing.com/Butterfly . * Donn King’s books. Find out about his latest and all his others at https://DonnKing.com/Books . * NEW: Find books featured by guests of The Alignment Show . * Rachael’s main website: RachaelHerron.com . * Rachael’s Patreon with tons of resources. * Rachael on Instagram . * Rachael’s latest book, The Seven Miracles of Beatrix Holland . * Ink in Your Veins , Rachael’s phenomenal podcast, on Apple and on Spotify . You can find Rachael’s earlier episodes here: and here: Remember that we have moved our home over to our new site at TheAlignmentShow.com . We encourage you to subscribe there! If you get value from the show, consider supporting us through Buy Me a Coffee . You can make a one-time contribution or sign up for regular support. Your support helps me continue helping you and others, and thank you in advance! You can also subscribe on Substack for free OR upgrade to a paid subscription to receive the following bonus material for each episode: * The “Big Takeaway” * A bulleted summary of the episode * Practical tips from the episode * A quote to ponder * Prefer text? We turn each podcast into an article. Plus, Founding Members receive ebook copies of all my books as well as a sponsorship message on the podcast at least once a month. That’s our way for saying “thanks for the support!” Note: if you accidentally subscribe on ConfidenceCultivators.com (which used to host the show), I will comp you the equivalent subscription on King’s Chronicles, the new home of The Alignment Show. Get full access to The Confidence Cultivator at confidencecultivator.substack.com/subscribe This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kingschronicles.substack.com/subscribe