Self(ish) Confidence

Hosted by Jess Clerke

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Episodes

318

Latest episode

Aug 2026

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EN-US

About the show

What if your confidence didn't depend on fitting into a box you never wanted to be in? Self(ish) Confidence is the podcast for women who are done living by someone else's timeline and ready to trust their own. Because let's be honest—it's hard to feel confident when you're constantly comparing yourself to everyone else's highlight reel or wondering if you're doing life "right." Comparison creeps in. Self-doubt gets louder. And suddenly, showing up as your authentic self feels impossible. But what if confidence wasn't about having it all figured out? What if it was about trusting yourself enough to take the next step? Each week, your host Jess Clerke, Confidence Coach, Human Design Guide, and creator of the Self(ish) Sisterhood, shares honest conversations, mindset shifts, personal stories, and practical tools to help you stop people-pleasing, embrace your uniqueness, and build confidence from the inside out. Whether your life looks unconventional, unexpected, or completely different than you imagined, you're in the right place. This is your permission slip to stop performing and start showing up as you. To trust your intuition. To shine your light. To create a life that feels deeply aligned—not one that simply looks good from the outside. Because you are not too much. You're not behind. And you don't need anyone else's permission to become the woman you're meant to be. Let's build that belief together.

Listen to episodes

60 recent

August 18, 2026Episode 31928 min

[319] What If Overwhelm Is Trying To Teach You

Overwhelm can make you feel like you’re failing at life when the truth is simpler: you’re carrying too much, for too long, with too few breaks. Today we’re getting real about that “chest-tightening” season where the calendar is packed, your brain is tired, and you’re tempted to either burn everything down or push through until you hit some magical date where you can finally breathe. I share what’s been happening behind the scenes after nearly five years of the podcast and why readjusting expectations is sometimes the most self-respecting move you can make. We walk through a practical reset for stress and overwhelm that starts with matching your schedule to your actual energy, not the energy you wish you had. You’ll hear how to find pockets of rest inside a busy week, why “small actions” beat big plans when you’re running on fumes, and how setting goals your most tired self can still do builds real confidence over time. If you’ve been stuck in the cycle of getting excited, overcommitting, and then feeling like you “can’t stick to anything,” this will feel like a deep exhale. We also talk about the part people skip: feeling the overwhelm instead of numbing it away. Your emotions are data, and they can point to what’s missing, like joy, play, and the kind of fun that lights you up. We end with ideas for bringing that energy back in small, doable ways, even in a full season of life. If this resonated, share it with a friend who’s maxed out, subscribe so you don’t miss what’s next, and please leave a rating or review so more people can find this support. Join the Self(ish) Sisterhood : $33/month or $333/year. Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love! Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com If you're on instagram, come say hi!! 👋👋 My Personal Account ---> @jess.clerke The Podcast Account ---> @selfishconfidence

August 5, 2026Episode 31823 min

[318] How to Trust Yourself When Life Changes Your Plans

Your plan can be perfect and life can still change by lunch. I’m Jess, and today I’m talking straight to the part of you that wants to control every pawn on the chessboard, because I’ve been there too. When my childcare plan shifted unexpectedly, I had a choice: spiral, or pivot. I’m choosing a “30 days of fun” mindset and soaking up a season I might never get again, even if it isn’t the version of summer I imagined. From that real-life pivot, we go deeper into trusting yourself when things don’t make sense on paper. We talk intuition and Human Design authority, including why “trust your gut” isn’t one-size-fits-all, and how different authority types can shape your decision-making. I share what splenic authority feels like for me, that quiet instant hit that shows up once and disappears, and how learning to listen has helped me build self-trust and confidence. Then we get practical about taking action when excuses get loud. If time is your biggest roadblock, I break down how to use small time pockets, why messy action beats waiting for perfect conditions, and how simple visual reminders like a vision board can keep your goals from getting buried under real life. We also talk community, sisterhood support, and why consistent action is where confidence actually grows. If you’re craving more self confidence, better intuition, and a grounded way to chase your goals in a busy season, hit play. Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs it, and leave a review so more women can find the show. Join the Self(ish) Sisterhood : $33/month or $333/year. Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love! Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com If you're on instagram, come say hi!! 👋👋 My Personal Account ---> @jess.clerke The Podcast Account ---> @selfishconfidence

July 28, 2026Episode 31733 min

[317] Break The Thought Loop

Your brain can turn one hard moment into a full-time soundtrack, and suddenly you’re living inside a rerun instead of your real life. I’m Jess, and I’m sharing what’s been hitting me hard lately: parenthood and childcare did not go the way I pictured, and it was dangerously easy to translate that into “I can’t create, I can’t grow, I can’t do my work right now.” That belief sounds practical, but it quietly becomes a cage. We dig into the cycle of replaying conversations, second-guessing what you said, and carrying that heaviness into everything else. I talk about how anxiety and “good girl” conditioning can keep us from using our voice, and why that loop drains your energy and steals your joy. If you’re a cycle breaker, a people pleaser, or a woman trying to lead with light while life feels sharp around the edges, this one is for you. Then we get practical with three tools to break the loop: seek joy (because spirals don’t thrive there), get into nature to regulate your nervous system, and flip the script the moment the old thought shows up. I also share a release ritual you can try today (write it down, burn it safely or tear it up, bury it), plus a visualization that sticks: treating your thoughts like cassette tapes, tossing the one that keeps you stuck, and choosing a new message on purpose. If affirmations feel weird, we talk options like sticky notes, an audio recording, and simple daily repetition. If this helped you, subscribe, share it with a friend who needs a gentle shake, and leave a quick rating and review so more women can find the show. Join the Self(ish) Sisterhood : $33/month or $333/year. Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love! Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com If you're on instagram, come say hi!! 👋👋 My Personal Account ---> @jess.clerke The Podcast Account ---> @selfishconfidence

July 24, 2026Episode 31612 min

[BOOST] What If Someone Needs What You Create?

Your best ideas always show up at the worst time: when you’re driving, showering, or staring at the ceiling right before sleep. I'm jumping on the mic for a short bonus boost to turn that familiar spark into something bigger, a reminder that creation is a practice, not a personality trait. If you’ve been telling yourself you’re not consistent enough, not confident enough, or not “ready,” this is the kind of pep talk that actually tells the truth. We riff on the ripple effect of creators and mentors, including how the EmpowerHer podcast helped bring this show to life. Then we go straight into the sticky part: visibility. The fear of judgment is real, and so is the reality that you might feel awkward, sound cringe, or even cry before you hit upload. We don’t pretend that goes away. We talk about why it’s still worth doing, and how self confidence is built by showing up scared and doing it anyway. Follow my sisters: Charlene at Wind Waves and Wands Meghan: @ teachonpause If you’ve been sitting on an idea, let this be your permission slip. Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs a push, and leave a review if the show helps. What are you going to create this week? Join the Self(ish) Sisterhood : $33/month or $333/year. Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love! Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com If you're on instagram, come say hi!! 👋👋 My Personal Account ---> @jess.clerke The Podcast Account ---> @selfishconfidence

July 14, 2026Episode 31526 min

[315] How To Let Go Of Identities That No Longer Fit

You can outgrow a label and still keep living like it’s true. We’re talking about the sneaky way old identities cling to us, even after we’ve healed, evolved, and built a life that proves we’re different now. I start with a rare quiet moment, a big love letter to this community, and a reminder that self-confidence isn’t about becoming someone new. It’s about remembering who you are and letting that version of you take up space again. We also dig into practical tools for identity change: getting clear on the new version of you, catching your automatic “auto-reply” thoughts, and practicing a redo in real time. I share a helpful Human Design angle, the G Center or identity center, and how it can explain why some of us feel steady while others shapeshift around different people. Then we tackle comparison and social media boundaries with my favorite metaphor: we all have different microwaves, so stop timing your growth by someone else’s clock. If you’re ready to crumple up a label that no longer fits and let the real you lead, press play. Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs it, and leave a review so more women can find this kind of confidence work. Join the Self(ish) Sisterhood : $33/month or $333/year. Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love! Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com If you're on instagram, come say hi!! 👋👋 My Personal Account ---> @jess.clerke The Podcast Account ---> @selfishconfidence

July 7, 2026Episode 31433 min

[314] Seasons That Shake Your Identity

Change can be exciting, but the part nobody warns you about is the identity whiplash. One day you’re handling life like you always have, and the next you’re in a new season, new schedule, new body, new priorities, and you’re still expecting the “old you” to keep up. I’m talking about the real impact of life transitions and why you don’t need to become someone brand new to grow, you need to remember who you are and come home to yourself. We start with a reminder to do everything with love, including how we treat ourselves when things feel messy. I share how community can feel “inconvenient,” but it’s also a privilege, and why support matters when you’re moving through a breakup, a new job, a move, parenthood, or any major shift that changes how you see yourself. We also get honest about the fear of judgment and why sharing your goals can feel vulnerable even with people who love you. If you’re in a season of change, come listen and be a little softer with yourself. Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs it, and leave a review so more sisters can find the support they’re looking for. 30-60-90 Day Consistency Tracker Confidently You Week 1 Free Trial Join the Self(ish) Sisterhood : $33/month or $333/year. Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love! Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com If you're on instagram, come say hi!! 👋👋 My Personal Account ---> @jess.clerke The Podcast Account ---> @selfishconfidence

June 30, 2026Episode 31325 min

[313] What If Your Best Summer Starts With Fun

Summer doesn’t wait, and neither should your joy. I’m Jess, and I’m talking to the woman who loves a checklist but keeps putting her own fun at the bottom of it, the “I’ll relax after the dishes” mindset that quietly steals the best parts of the season. You’ll hear me unpack the difference between planning by time and planning by energy, plus practical, realistic ways to build an epic summer without needing a huge trip or a perfect schedule. Think tiny pockets of self-care, pairing your kids’ activities with something that fills you up, and creating a summer bucket list that includes you. If you’ve been craving more confidence, more fun, and a better work-life balance, this one is your permission slip. If this hits home, share it with a friend who needs a little more time for herself, then subscribe and leave a rating and review so more women can find the Selfish Confidence Podcast. Join the Self(ish) Sisterhood : $33/month or $333/year. Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love! Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com If you're on instagram, come say hi!! 👋👋 My Personal Account ---> @jess.clerke The Podcast Account ---> @selfishconfidence

June 23, 2026Episode 31229 min

[312] The Things I Swore I'd Never Do

“I would never do that” can feel like a boundary, but sometimes it’s a wall. Today we get honest about the weird moment when you look back at your past self and laugh because you did the exact thing you swore you’d never do and it actually made your life better. I’m sharing my own never say never turns, plus the mindset shift that helped me stop treating every decision like a locked door. Then we go deeper than “confidence tips.” I’ve been feeling a shift toward self reclamation: figuring out who you are without labels, noise, and old rules you inherited. Confidence becomes the result of knowing yourself, trusting your gut, and letting yourself evolve through big life transitions like relationships, motherhood, and career pivots. The question I leave you with is simple and uncomfortable in the best way: what would happen if you didn’t say never? If this hits home, subscribe so you don’t miss what’s next, share it with a friend who’s in a pivot, and leave a review so more women can find the show. What’s the biggest “never” you’ve outgrown? Join the Self(ish) Sisterhood : $33/month or $333/year. Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love! Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com If you're on instagram, come say hi!! 👋👋 My Personal Account ---> @jess.clerke The Podcast Account ---> @selfishconfidence

June 9, 2026Episode 31126 min

[311] Your Lack Of Confidence Is Showing 🙈

The fastest way to spot a confidence dip is not in what you say, it’s in what you do next: the overexplaining, the defensiveness, the mental replay of a one-minute interaction that suddenly feels like a life review. If that sounds familiar, you’re going to feel seen here. We unpack the sneaky signs your self-confidence is slipping and why it often happens during big life transitions. I share what’s been lighting up my own “seeds of doubt” lately, from parenting choices and toddler tantrums to the weird emotions around starting daycare, balancing work and family, and even stepping into an updated personal style and rebrand. When we’re not fully grounded in our decisions, other people’s opinions can shake us fast, even when they mean well. We also talk about the reality that everyone has opinions, and how the Let Them perspective can help you stop making those opinions your responsibility. The goal is not to become louder or tougher. It’s to build self-trust, get clear on the season you’re in, and practice responding in a way that keeps your peace. Think of it as watering confidence instead of watering doubt. If you’re ready for a mindset reset that’s practical and honest, press play. After you listen, subscribe, share it with a friend who needs a boost, and leave a review so more women can find this confidence coaching energy. What seed of doubt are you working through right now? Apply for 1:1 Confidence Coaching with me. Join the Self(ish) Sisterhood : $33/month or $333/year. Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love! Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com If you're on instagram, come say hi!! 👋👋 My Personal Account ---> @jess.clerke The Podcast Account ---> @selfishconfidence

June 3, 2026Episode 31031 min

[310] What If Your Distractions Aren’t Random At All

Your attention is getting pulled in a hundred directions, and it’s not because you’re lazy or “bad at discipline.” It’s because modern life is designed to distract you and if you’re parenting, building a business, working a job, or just trying to feel like yourself again, those distractions can quietly eat the year you swore would be different. I’m sharing a real-life reset: how I think about showing up imperfectly, why I’m not “starting over,” and what it means to stay human and authentic in a world packed with AI content and constant noise. Then we get into the practical stuff, because motivation isn’t enough when your phone, your inbox, your clutter, and your mental load keep interrupting you. We talk about identifying your biggest distractions, running a simple one-day tally to find your patterns, and building small distraction-free pockets of time that actually fit real life. You’ll also hear the boundaries that help most, especially around social media and screen time, plus an easy way to keep a “distraction list” so your brain stops spinning with all the little things you’re afraid you’ll forget. And we end with the reminder I think you need: you don’t have to be perfect to make progress, but you do need to protect your attention if you want that vision board to turn into your real life. If this hits home, share it with a friend, leave a review, and send me a message with your number one distraction and what you’re trying to achieve so we can tackle it together. Join the Self(ish) Sisterhood : $33/month or $333/year. Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love! Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com If you're on instagram, come say hi!! 👋👋 My Personal Account ---> @jess.clerke The Podcast Account ---> @selfishconfidence